RondoMusings

Barney Frankl

2011-08-21T14:02:00.000-05:00

Barney, My Love's brother, died last Monday, August 15, after more than a year of fighting cancer. His funeral, which was celebrated last Friday, August 19, was a wonderful testimony to his generous and loving life. It was my great privilege to share the following reflections about Barney during the funeral liturgy.

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Bernard Urban Frankl. Barney. Young Barney or Little Barney to distinguish him from Big Barney, his Uncle. Ringman. Ringman Barn.

He went by many different handles throughout his life. What words or names do you think of when you think of Barney? When I ponder about him and his life, I come up with two words: Grateful Connector.

Barney focused his energies on connecting with people no matter where he was. He would call all of us on our birthdays or anniversaries. When he was driving his truck across the country, if he knew of a high school classmate living in a certain locale that he was passing through, he would call them up to connect with them, even if he hadn't talked with them for thirty or forty years. He connected with distant relatives in Virginia, in California, in Texas, in New York. No one was a stranger, only a new friend with whom he could connect.

We've all heard the story of the woman whom he found at a truck stop with a wound on her foot. She was in dire need of medical attention, but had no one to look after her. Barney transported her to the hospital, paid for her treatment, and left money there for her care. A true Good Samaritan.

I heard Barney say one time: "It doesn't take a lot of brains to be an over-the-road truck driver. And there certainly isn't a great deal of satisfaction in it. So I have decided that it is my goal each day to make one person smile, to make one person's day better." So, when he would enter a restaurant or truck stop cafe, he would look around to see which waitress was having a bad day. Then he would sit at her table and try to cheer her up. The first thing he would notice when she came to the table was the size of her ring finger. Then he would proceed to fold a dollar bill into a ring the exact size to fit her. When he presented her with the ring, inevitably it brought a smile to her face. If all the people to whom Barney had given a ring over the years were to be here today, I venture to say that we could not begin to fit them into this church.

Barney has two sisters: Annette and Janella. He would tell each of them that she was his favorite sister. And he was right. Because Barney had the wonderful gift of making each person that he was with feel like they were the most important person in the world, his favorite person. I know that I am his favorite brother-in-law. And so is Jim.

All this Barney did with an attitude of gratitude. He lived with a grateful heart. His example throughout life was a constant reminder to all of us that while we have no control over the hand that life deals us, we do have control over how we play that hand. Barney played the hand dealt to him with joy and gratitude, never complaining but always rejoicing in his blessings. Those of us fortunate enough to have been around him during his last months of life experienced a man continually thanking God for the opportunity to have his family around him as together they prepared for his death.

Barney did not die a millionaire. But he did die a wealthy man. For he was rich in the relationships that were the fruit of his life of connecting. Those relationships he takes with him while at the same time remaining connected in all our hearts.

Now he is reconnecting with his dad, Gerald, his brother, Mike, his in-laws, Bruce and Evelyn, and all the other relatives and friends that have gone before him. Now he is Barney the Reconnector.

I look forward to the day that Barney can reconnect me to Gerald, Mike, even to my own Dad and my brother Jim. I am sure that when that day comes, I will still be his favorite.

Real Creativity

2011-04-26T15:56:00.003-05:00

Yesterday we buried My Love's Father, Gerald. At the wake the preceding evening, I shared the following reflections.

Gerald loved to hold a baby or a small child in his arms. His observation would then be: "You can't be closer to God than when looking in the face of a child."

I would propose another image for Gerald.

God's first commandment in the Bible comes after he has finished creating human beings. God says: "Increase, multiply, fill the earth and subdue it" (Gen 1:28). Herein lies the invitation for us to be co-creators with God, to use our gifts and talents to further God's creative action in our own world.

Gerald took this invitation literally, and it became the guiding light of his life. With his devoted and loving wife, Rita, he created a family of 9 children, 35 grandchildren and 48 great-grandchildren, most of whom are here with us for this celebration.

His creativity flowed out and improved our world through his inventions. Those inventions are still touching and renewing our earth through the business he established which is being carried on by his son, Don.

Many of us here have been the beneficiaries of Gerald's creative thought through his many marble boards, clocks, diamond willow walking sticks, and many other projects.

I had the great blessing with My Love of living nearby Gerald for ten years in south Texas. In that time I observed his creativity in action often. Because his creative mind was continually churning, it became a challenge for us to think up projects to keep him occupied, as much for his own good as for Rita's sanity.

For instance, at one point I made the mistake of purchasing a 22 foot sailboat on a trailer. The trailer needed serious attention. So I said to Gerald: "How can I get the boat off the trailer so I can fix and paint the trailer?" He said, "Let me think about it for a week." One week later, he came to me and asked if I could get 2 lengths of old fire hose. Because I knew the Fire Marshall through my work, I was able to acquire the hose. Gerald then made 2 slings, and with 2 come-alongs we hoisted the boat off the trailer, hung it from the rafters in my shop, and proceeded to repair the trailer.

Tonight I would like to thank you, Gerald, for revealing to us the face of our Creator God. Through you I have been able to know God the Father, our Creator, in the flesh.

As we look at history, we find men named Alexander the Great, William the Conqueror, and Richard the Lionhearted. To me, you will always be Gerald the Creator.

What a Jolt!

2011-02-09T00:01:00.002-06:00

Waking up yesterday morning to temperatures of 14 degrees below zero was a real shock. Never getting up to the zero mark for the whole day was enough to call the moving truck to go someplace else.

Then looking at the picture of our cruise ship on my desk brought back memories of warmer times in more pleasant places. While there is no question that God is present in this Iowa deep freeze, it certainly is much easier to acknowledge his presence in the tropical beauties of the Caribbean.

Cruising for 2 1/2 days brought us to the beautiful isle of Jamaica. We took the opportunity to catch a taxi to a local beach where we spent a couple of hours swimming and basking in the glorious sunshine. We thought of everyone back home in Iowa.

On board again for a lovely evening meal, we proceeded to Grand Cayman island. After catching a small tender (boat from the ship to shore), we joined a group traveling to another beach. Here the water was a bright green, with white sands. How refreshing to just soak in the sun and the surf.

Another overnight sail brought us to the highlight of the trip for us: Cozumel. Here we joined a beach party which included all the food (wonderful international buffet) and drinks (how about a Kahlua colada!) on the blue water beach with a chaise lounge and beach umbrella. It was truly a slice of heaven!

After the seven night excursion, we returned refreshed and relaxed. The wonderful company of good friends, accompanied by the scrumptious food and relaxed fun, made this a break worth repeating. God's presence was so evident in the vastness of the ocean, the beauty of the tropical paradises, and the warmth of the sun. In fact, we purchased a certificate indicating our choice of another cruise sometime in the next 24 months in order to appreciate those beauties even more.

The warmth of the memories from our trip have truly softened the harshness of this wintry blast we are now enduring. I believe that we will make it till spring.

Outta Here!

2011-01-14T00:01:00.001-06:00

Ten inches of snow last Sunday and Monday; thirty miles per hour winds Tuesday; eight degrees below zero on Wednesday; and the promise of more to come! I think it is time to escape and get out of this winter pattern, if only for a while.

Therefore My Love and I are leaving today to embark on a 7-day cruise. We will be sailing on Sunday from Galveston with 2 other couples to float across the Caribbean. With stops in Jamaica, Grand Cayman and Cozumel, we anticipate many opportunities to forget snow and freezing temperatures.

Upon our return, I am certain that our outlook will be completely different. Even though there may not be many changes in our frozen tundra here in Iowa, our view of it will have been refreshed. Until then!

Stay tuned for updates -- after the fact!

Under the Surface

2011-01-11T00:01:00.004-06:00

Two stories in the news caught my attention over the weekend. One was the obviously tragic shooting in Tucson, AZ in which six persons died, a Congresswoman and several others were wounded and hospitalized.

The second story was the conclusion of the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas. During the previous week 140,000+ people viewed the latest in electronic gadgets for improving lifestyles in our modern world.

In the ensuing aftermath of the former incident, there are voices crying for better gun control, less vitriol in the political arena and better protection for political leaders. Fingers are being pointed at Sarah Palin and/or news media for inflaming people's feelings against various segments of our establishment. Other voices are pleading for a more civil and unified discourse as we carry out the selection and business of government.

I am struck by two things as I reflect upon both of these happenings. First of all, it seems that the more communication devices we develop, manufacture and sell, the less we are able to really connect with one another as individuals, as persons. The more rapidly we let our thumbs poke out our messages, the more distant we become from opening our eyes and looking into the hearts and souls of one another. This leads to the depersonalization of relationships and the impersonalization of the individual.

Secondly, these conditions only add to and deepen the underlying problem that surfaced in Tucson, Omaha, Boston and so many other scenes of violence lately. That problem is the total lack of respect for the human person that has permeated our society. It is impossible for individuals who have no respect for themselves to demonstrate any care or concern for those around them. Those who have been raised in a culture of death--a society which refuses to care for its unborn, its veterans or its elderly--cannot be expected to manifest respect for their own generation, much less their leaders or elders.

We are merely reaping what we have sown over the last 40-50 years. Without changes on our own personal levels, developing respect for each individual in our families, our neighborhoods, our workplaces and our churches, we will continue to experience the horrific and tragic kind of events that we have seen lately. It all begins with a respect and love for ourselves. Jesus says, "Love your neighbor as you love yourself."

Financial Freedom

2011-01-06T00:01:00.001-06:00

Sam and Linda were unable to make the payments on their car loan. Consequently, the vehicle was repossessed by the finance company. Yet, each day they ate their lunch at the local Burger King.

Tom and Judy bought new furniture and cupboards for their home, charging it to their credit cards. When Tom's employer let him go because of the economic downturn, they found themselves in financial trouble. Finally they had to declare bankruptcy in order to handle all their bills.

These are but two examples (and I'm sure you can add many of your own) of people who created their own problems through lack of planning and poor management. The ability to earn a living does not carry with it the correlative intelligence to act as a good steward in the use of that income.

So often in my lifetime I have witnessed individuals and families who are struggling, not because of lack of resources, but because of imprudence in the utilization of those resources. I have wanted to ask them two questions: "What are your priorities? What do you want out of your life, now and in the future?"

If they are able to answer those questions, then it is simply a matter of placing their behavior, their choices, their actions alongside to see what fits and what doesn't. Making decisions based on our life's values, goals and priorities avoids irrational and emotional choices which get us into difficulty. It also allows for greater planning leading to long term satisfaction, peace and happiness.

There are many programs, mentors, gurus and aides available to assist in this process. One website that I found particularly helpful is www.financialintegrity.org. It is a self-help, at-your-own-pace program that is free. It provides a process which helps to clear away many of the cobwebs that our consumer society places in our road.

When we have defined our own values and goals, it becomes much easier to live according to them. Then we are much more participants in our own life, and less victims of circumstances. Recognizing our giftedness by God with all that we need to live enables us to have a heart that is open to others. This attitude of gratitude brings with it a freedom and peace that is truly beyond understanding.

Significant Happenings of 2010

2010-12-31T10:50:00.000-06:00

A couple of days ago there was a mini poll on the front page of the local newspaper. The question was asked: Was 2010 a good year or a bad year for you? 57% said it was a good year, 43% answered bad.

That set me thinking about my year. As I look back it was definitely a good year. But then I don't have any bad years to look back upon. Perhaps it's all in my perspective. The following list of happenings from the year came to mind, not necessarily in any order of importance.

1. My Love and I went on a 5 day cruise in January. It was so relaxing, refreshing and renewing that we have decided to repeat the experience on a 7 day version this year.

2. My Mother endured an operation last summer. Her period of recuperation was much longer than anticipated, but we are all grateful that she is doing well now. This whole experience did not strengthen our confidence in the medical system.

3. My Love's brother, Mike, died very suddenly. His death reminded us all of how precious life is, and how important it is to live each moment to the fullest. Since Mike was a perfect example of that reality, he had no regrets, we have none for him, even though his presence is missed greatly.

4. My Love's Father continues his slow, steady decline in the nursing home. His gentle, loving acceptance of his reality is an inspiration to all of us in the midst of a difficult situation. Also, the faith of My Love's Mother is a true sign of God's presence. The opportunity to support and care for both of them has been a blessing to both My Love and me.

5. My 50th Class Reunion in September was an enjoyable and fun experience. It was a bit of a surprise to be surrounded with so many "old" people! But they could really dance.

6. Having a steady job with a good company in these rocky economic times is a true cause for gratitude. The opportunity to work with good people and assist people in need only adds to the blessing.

7. Going home to our little Shack in the woods is like having our own private retreat house. How refreshing and renewing it is to be able to soak up the gifts of nature by simply stepping outdoors or looking out the windows.

8. Two opportunities to visit with our friends, Gail and Marilyn, in person were definite highlights. Once they came to our Shack, the second time we spent time with them at the home of their daughter. The treasure of this friendship is truly a gift.

9. The loving support and constant encouragement of My Love for me makes all things possible, and everything joyful. The gift of her presence in my life cannot be overestimated. Nor can I be adequately thankful.

10. Finally it is the gift of faith which puts a positive spin on all life's happenings. This it is which enables me to join with the 57% above who declared this past year as a good one. For it is not what happens to us that is important, only what we do with what happens to us. "If God is for us, who can be against us" (Romans 8:31).

May your New Year 2011 be filled with blessings that you recognize. May God be present in ways that you can accept.

Just Passing Through

2010-12-09T00:01:00.002-06:00

What a scary shock and jolting surprise it was to come home last Sunday afternoon to find a large, jagged hole in our kitchen window. Lying on the floor just in front of the sink was a 12 gauge shotgun slug which had penetrated both the double-pane window and the inside screen.

On Sunday morning we had traveled to Carroll to take my Mother home. She had spent the previous two weeks with us, relaxing and enjoying our life in the country. It was a wonderful time as she visited My Love's Mother, played cards and other games, read lots of books from the library, and just "hung out". On Saturday evening, we traveled to Sheldon to witness the official installation of my brother, Allan, as the new pastor of St Patrick's Parish. She enjoyed her visit to our Little Piece of Paradise.

The first shotgun season for deer opened last weekend. Saturday and Sunday the hills around our house were crawling with guys in neon orange vests and hats. Traffic on our normally quiet gravel road was approaching rush-hour level. The addition of alcohol to the mixture minimized the safety factor in some instances.

Hence the incident in our house. When we arrived late Sunday afternoon, we were shocked, but grateful that we had been gone. The window in question sits directly over the kitchen sink where My Love stands while washing dishes. The projectile entered at head level at a downward angle, crossing from left to right. It could have been dangerous for someone standing by the sink.

Once again we are grateful to God for his presence and protection in our lives. Perhaps next year we will go away for the weekend when deer season opens.

On The Other Hand

2010-12-07T00:01:00.004-06:00

In the musical, "Fiddler On The Roof," Tevya displays a beautiful and very real relationship with God. He carries on a conversation with God throughout the story saying, "Dear God, on the one hand....then on the other hand..." In this way he prays through the various problems and decisions of his life, seeing both sides of the issue before making his choice. Until his third daughter informs him that she is going to marry a Gentile, and he says to God, "There is no other hand."

How difficult, but at the same time how critical, it is to see all sides to any situation. When making decisions concerning our life, whether personal, communal, political, ecclesial, business or whatever, it is so important to realize that there are various ways of looking at the question under discussion.

Many of the "hot button" issues of our world deserve discussing, airing all sides so that intelligent and informed decisions can be made. Whether we are talking about involvement in war in Iraq or Afghanistan, tax cuts for this group or that, stem cell research, abortion, same sex marriage, the relation of Islam to terrorists, or whatever other concern you carry, there is a need to hold in depth discussions in order to grasp the full implications of all aspects of those issues. Only when we have set aside our preconceived judgments and conclusions, entered into honest dialog under the guidance of the Spirit in an atmosphere of prayer can we hope to arrive at some sort of peace and harmony in our torn world. Maybe, in some cases, like Tevya, we will come to the conclusion that "there is no other hand". But that cannot be the starting place.

If this season of Christmas shows us anything, it is that God will go to any extreme to bring forgiveness, peace and healing to our broken world. But God needs our consent and cooperation to get it accomplished at this time in history.

Pray Twice

2010-12-02T00:01:00.002-06:00

Growing up in a Catholic family, attending a K-12 Catholic school, worshipping in a Catholic faith community, I oft heard the refrain: "He who sings, prays twice." Music was an integral part of my life and the life of our family.

Now my sister, Diane Mahoney, who grew up in that same environment, has cut a CD of religious, spiritual songs. For the last 30+ years she has placed her talents and her Masters Degree in music at the service of the Catholic faith community as liturgist, organist and choir director in the various parishes to which she belonged. Along with two other musician friends, she has produced a beautiful CD entitled "Give Me Jesus". It is a varied collection of spiritual and meditative songs from traditional to contemporary style, all designed to give praise and honor to God as they lift the minds and hearts of the listeners.

As I listened for the first time to this inspirational disc, my heart was touched and the tears flowed down my face. I felt like Moses before the burning bush when God said: "Take off your sandals for you are standing on holy ground" (Ex 3:5). I definitely was in the Presence of the Divine.

To enjoy a taste of this masterpiece by listening to track 4, click on the icon below.

Ave Maria (Hail Mary).wma

This song, and all the rest, are wonderful reflections for this Advent season. What a gift this would be for yourself or one of your loved ones in this special time of God's giving to us. To order "Give Me Jesus", contact Diane Mahoney at (319) 752-3487, or email her at stanmah@mchsi.com. Give yourself the gift of praying twice.

Not Holding Up My End!

2010-11-30T00:01:00.003-06:00

Over the weekend, I watched an interview with a man coming out of a Best Buy store. He detailed how he had just purchased several wide screen TVs, a computer, an ebook reader, and several other electronic gadgets. Altogether he had spent more than $3,000 for Christmas gifts in this one spree.

Later, poll results were released on the same news broadcast showing that people were expecting to spend more money this year on Christmas shopping than last year, an average of more than $760 each.

All I could think of was how I was skewing those figures. Since we have not exchanged presents in our families for many years, I do not get into the frenzy of this consumerist hubbub. What a relief it is to not have to fight the crowds, lose sleep by going out in the middle of the night to catch a bargain, and then fight those same crowds to return unwanted or ill-fitting articles.

Yet, I see all around me individuals who are laboring under the pressure to measure up to someone else's expectations through their gift giving. They seem to lack freedom in the search for approval from others through their exchange of material things. For many of them, this season is truly a burden. The debt undertaken weighs them down long into the next year, long after the newness has worn off the proffered bauble.

I don't think that I am a Scrooge. It isn't that I don't want to make others happy, or enjoy receiving from them. It's just that I appreciate the freedom of not being manipulated by the retail and advertising industries. The true spirit of this season is definitely giving. God gave us everything in His Son, Jesus. In anticipation of that Great Gift, I want to enter into the spirit of this Advent season. I desire a true spirit of longing, but not just for things.

May this next month be a time of rest, peace and joy, not hectic guilt, burdensome debt and numbing worry over how to pay the bills.

I'm Thankful Because...

2010-11-23T00:01:00.016-06:00

I'm grateful that I'm not a turkey, though some may dispute that reality. Not because I'd be in danger of ending up on someone's table this week. Not because I could give myself for the enjoyment of others. Not even because my own purpose could be enhanced by the tastiness of dressing, sweet potatoes, cranberries, pumpkin pie and other delicacies.

No, I am thankful because, compared to the thanksgiving bird, my brain in relation to my body is proportionately much greater. The pea-sized brain of the turkey is so small that the poor fowl doesn't even have a sense of self-preservation. I recall when I was a youngster at home, my Dad took his truck to haul young turkeys for a local farmer who raised them. When the box of the truck was raised up to unload them, the turkeys would come off in a pile. Then it was necessary to get into the pile with a broom and scatter them or they would just lie there on top of one another and smother.

This larger brain provides me with the opportunity to be grateful not just this one day each year. My cranial capacity allows me to adopt an attitude of gratitude throughout the year. I can truly follow St Paul's admonition: "Rejoice always, never cease praying, in all circumstances give thanks" (1 Thes 5:17-18). This mindset of thankfulness is a choice based not on how wonderful the circumstances of my life are, but rather on how deep within is the conviction that God is in charge of my life. If God is truly in charge, then I have nothing to fear, and everything for which to be thankful. "If God is for us, who can be against us" (Romans 8:31). So, thank you!

Therefore, as we gather together as family at the home of My Love's sister to celebrate this family feast, with each mouthful of food, I will be breathing a prayer of thanks. May that prayer become as second-nature as the breathing and eating, so that it will continue long after the left-overs have disappeared.

"I Wanna Go Home..."

2010-11-20T00:01:00.005-06:00

When I went off to college after graduating from high school, it was the farthest I had ever been from home. In fact, when I had traveled the 260 miles to visit the college before making my decision, I thought for sure that we were driving off the end of the world. Not so!

I was reminded of my Grandfather who loved to tell the story of his neighbor who had traveled 21 miles north of home by horse and wagon. After he returned home, he said to my Grandfather, "Man, Joe, if the world stretches as far to the south as it does to the north, it is really a big one!"

However, the emotional distance was even farther. When my parents left after delivering me to the college campus, I became very homesick. I was unable to sleep, or eat. Studying was impossible. I felt cut off from anything familiar, comfortable or secure. It was a new experience for me, and I didn't like it. I was truly sick.

My parents traveled the long distance on several weekends to support me, encourage me, and try to help me adjust to this new reality in my life. However, after one such weekend visit in October, they left for home late Sunday, only to have me sign out of the college on Tuesday, mail all my stuff to my parents' address, and then hitchhike home. I showed up at their front door late Tuesday evening much to their surprise.

After spending a couple of days around home, I soon discovered that all my friends were gone off to school. Everyone around there was taken up with their own life and activities. There was no future to hanging around my birthplace. Life was moving on in the world in which I had grown up, and I didn't fit in there anymore. So I decided to "tough it out" and go back to college. But I will never laugh at, or ridicule anyone who struggles with homesickness. It is a REAL malady.

With the hindsight of these many years (remember we celebrated our 50th anniversary of graduation!), I have come to recognize and appreciate the longing for home that lies deep within the human heart. The hunger which God has built into our spirits can only be satisfied with the Divine Presence. As the Psalmist says: "As the deer longs for running water, so my soul thirsts for you, my God. Athirst is my soul for God, the living god. When shall I go and behold the face of God?" (Ps 42:2-3)

Yet, I am also aware of the many times that I have tried to quench that thirst with things, people, activity, stuff. I came away feeling like I did above when I went home from college and found no future there. I recall the words of St Augustine back in the 5th century: "Our hearts are restless, O Lord, and they will not rest until they rest in You." (Confessions)

When, or in what circumstances have you found this same thirsting, this same restlessness, this same homesickness in your life? How do you deal with it?

Healing Sleep

2010-11-17T00:01:00.002-06:00

In the last year I have noticed several studies published highlighting the importance of a good night's sleep. All of them seem to confirm the need of the human body for eight hours of slumber in order to maintain health, sustain a positive attitude and protect mental stability. Nothing really new in this, but certainly something that is not practiced by a great number of people in our society.

I recall a woman I worked with many years ago who claimed that she only needed 3-4 hours of sleep a night. She would function on that amount for sometime, then would get knocked off her feet by a terrific cold, sore throat, flu or other malady. After being laid up for several days or a week, she would then go back to the same prior routine.

When I went to college, I made a decision that I would not stay up after 11:00 pm. Others ridiculed me. I missed out on some activities, though at this point in my life I am hard pressed to recall even a single one. Since I was (am) a morning person, I knew that I would function better and be more productive by getting a good night's rest before entering into the next day's schedule. I always recall my Mother's voice telling me "Go to bed on the same day that you got up!" This tidbit of wisdom has served me well even up to today.

Why bring this up at this time? The habits of our youth travel with us into old age. Sleep is still the best medicine for the body, and is truly a gift for those who have it. But people will say "I can't stop my mind from thinking about .....", or "I keep worrying about....." How important it is to be able to place all our concerns and worries in the Lord's hands, and then truly leave them there. We need the attitude of Pope John XXIII who, when he was going to bed at night, would pray: "Lord, you take care of your Church. I'm going to sleep."

The Psalmist also reminds us: "It is vain for you to rise early, or put off your rest, you that eat hard-earned bread, for (the Lord) gives to his beloved in sleep." (Psalm 127:2) If we want God to take care of our problems while we sleep, we have to give them over to him and LET GO. Then go to sleep.

The Book

2010-11-12T00:01:00.005-06:00

When I began jotting down my reflections nearly two years ago in this blog form, my goals were quite limited and simple. Though I was doing it more for myself, I have been pleased that a few others have appreciated my meanderings and ramblings, and have seen fit to comment, react to, and expand on them.

A rather surprising response came from friends Gail and Marilyn, whom I have mentioned more than once in this space. They urged me to collect the blogs and publish them in book form. Something I had never considered.

However, after several pushes and jabs from them, I began searching online for a way to accomplish this request. Voila! I happened upon a website: Blurb.com. Here were the tools for "slurping" (their word) my blogs, editing them into book form, and publishing them. It was a fun and challenging project! Also very satisfying to see the results. Sometimes I surprise even myself!

You can view the finished product by clicking on the button in the left hand column "RondoMusings: The Book". That will take you to the Blurb website and their bookstore.

While there, you may also look into the possibilities they have for publishing your own book. Many people have a hidden dream to produce a book, with photos, text, or a combination of both. Take a look, you may be on to something exciting!

Live Simply

2010-11-08T00:01:00.002-06:00

On the evening news one night last week, there was a segment about a young man who was trying to live with 100 or less items in his life. He is part of a growing movement of people who focus on simplifying their lifestyles, whether from personal principles or economic necessity. He had actually succeeded in decreasing the amount of stuff that had previously burdened him down. Yet, he was living a comfortable and adequate existence.

It reminded me of a priest friend from years past. His goal was to be able to move everything he owned in his car when he was transferred from one assignment to another in his ministry. Obviously, because he always lived in parish accommodations, he did not need to own, and therefore move, furniture, appliances, etc. However, he did limit his personal belongings, library, other stuff to what he could transport in his automobile.

Such simple living has many benefits and advantages. Besides providing the opportunity to counteract the greed and acquisitiveness that is part of our human nature and certainly our society, this choice to live simply brings great freedom of spirit. All the energy that would be spent in collecting and protecting our stuff can now be spent in other more lofty endeavors such as serving other people.

When we journeyed through our Hurricane Experience, we found that changed our lifestyle. What a blessing that has proven to be as we now enjoy a much more simple life. The beauty, joy and peace of God's world have become much more evident. The time My Love and I have for each other and our families has multiplied. We appreciate the freedom that is ours because of our simpler existence. We obviously have not reached the point of living on 100 or less items. However, the definite choice to downsize has reaped a harvest beyond measure.

To see suggestions about Living Simply So That Others May Simply Live, go to this website: http://www.suite101.com/content/living-with-less-a279107. There are many other sites that can be googled for more information, but this one is a good place to start.

Us vs Them

2010-11-03T22:00:00.002-05:00

In high school there was the face off between the Geeks and Jocks. Depending on which side of the divide one was on, the other side was seen as second class, lower than or less than human. The ones that could "strut their stuff" were able to call the shots for entire school body.

That same tendency to divide the human race into Us and Them runs deep in our nature. During times of war we label the enemy in order to dehumanize them. So we had, during WWII, the Japs and the Krauts; during the Korean War, the Slant Eyes and the Chinks; Vietnam saw us facing the Cong, the VC; and in our current wars we are up against the Ragheads, the Terrorists, the Islamic Fundamentalists.

Once we have slapped a denigrating label on another person or group of people we have greater freedom in denying their human dignity. It then becomes much easier to kill them. For most people, it is very difficult to take the life of another person whom we recognize as an equal to us. Hence our need to dehumanize them if we are to eliminate them from our personal world.

This same need to divide into Us vs Them is evident on the political front that is now over. Whether it is Democrat vs Republican, Liberal vs Conservative, or whatever other category you wish to develop, the purpose is the same -- to cast the other in the role of enemy and so to eliminate them from the picture. That division only brings about the loss of half of our human resources and leaves us that much more impoverished. The point at which we have divided our world into Us vs Them, whether something so simple as Left Handers vs Everyone Else, that is the point at which we are all losers. When we exclude someone else from our life we have deprived outselves of some form of richness.

Jesus came into a world that was divided between the Jews and the Gentiles. Each saw the other as the enemy. The Jews were further divided into the Pharisees, the Sadducees and the Samaritans. Each of these groups was pitted against the others. Instead of choosing one group to the exclusion of the others, Jesus reached out and included all of them in His Father's plan of salvation. Whenever confronted by one or the other, he would invite them into his circle, into his Kingdom. No one was excluded except those who chose to exclude themselves.

How would our world be different today if, instead of Us vs Them, our vision was Us and Them, WE together? If we viewed others through the perspective of Jesus, of including rather than excluding them, would we not handle the problems, differences and difficulties with a renewed energy and more hopeful commitment? Let's begin with our own families. Not Parents vs Children, or Older Generation vs Younger Generation. But by bridging the gap between Us and Them, by changing our perspective to a WE Together, only then can we initiate the Kingdom of God in our midst today. Only then can we hope to overcome the barriers between us all.

Fall Beauty

2010-11-01T07:06:00.000-05:00

My memory does not go back far enough to recall a fall season that has been more pleasant than this one. For the last four weeks we have had temperatures in the above-normal range with little moisture. It has been a perfect harvest season for the farmers as they have completed both the bean and corn production. After a couple of windy and cooler days, we are now back on track with beautiful weather, allowing those same farmers to apply fertilizer, work the soil for next year, and begin to enjoy the fruits of their labors.

Many of the trees have been bedecked in fall glory. The geese have begun drifting south, and the other songbirds are also absent. Leaves rustle underfoot as we amble through the yard. The garden has been cleared off after a most abundant crop of tomatoes, lettuce, potatoes, carrots, onions, beats and finally mounds of squash. As we close out this month of October, the recognition dawns that there is something new coming, something we are maybe not yet prepared to face.

Yet, with the approach of winter, we are reminded once again of the cycle of life. Like the rhubarb and the asparagus, we also need a "down time" to be able to rest, reflect and renew our energies. Recalling a year ago, we already had three weeks of cold, snowy, wet weather which had made it nearly impossible for the farmers to function. So, it is with gratitude to God that we welcome the month of November and whatever the next few months bring. We know for certain that the same God who has blessed us through this beautiful fall will go before us into the approaching winter.

People Look Like...

2010-10-28T22:00:00.016-05:00

When I was growing up in the 50's and the 60's, I remember there being a strong sense of national responsibility and accountability for the great gifts that we shared as a nation. There were programs like Peace Corps and VISTA (Volunteers in Service to America) established to provide avenues of sharing our wealth, our talents and our time with others in the world who were not as fortunate as we. We recognized how blessed we were as a nation. Following upon that came the concomitant responsibility for those gifts. We somehow knew, if only in our unconscious hearts that "from whom much has been given, much will be expected" (Luke 12:47).

All that began to change in the 1980's. With the rise of the "Greed Is Good" culture, we started to view those who were less fortunate than we as a threat to our own material security. Rather than recognizing their human dignity and right to participate in the goods of the earth, we adjusted our perspective so that they became responsible for their own material situation. Since they had created their own circumstances, we were no longer obligated to alleviate their misery by sharing our abundance. We were free to simply accumulate and enjoy without thought of responsibility to others.

This background history has been underlined and highlighted in these last months of electioneering as we have come up to the voting next week. As I listen to the buzz words of the political ads, I am struck by the selfishness that seeps out between the cracks. The worst name that can be given to a candidate is "liberal". That used to identify someone who wants to share the wealth and abundance with those who have not. Now it has come to signify someone who wants to take everything away from YOU and give it THEM (THEM being those who do not deserve anything except the miserable conditions they have put themselves in).

The underlying question that has been raised for me is, how do I (we) view people around me (us). Do I see them as human beings with a dignity given by God? Are they my equals with a right to the blessings of the earth with which I have been blessed? Or do I see them as parasites on the human race trying to get something for nothing? My attitude towards them and judgment of them will affect not only how I view these elections and how I vote. More importantly, it will influence my day-to-day interactions with each person I meet. Ultimately, my perception of reality and the people around me will create my eternal stance before God. It is impossible to view individuals as anything other than human reflections of the Divine and still be included in God's family.

The only passage in the New Testament where Jesus speaks of the judgment that we will face at the end of our life is in Matthew 25:40. "Whatever you do to the least of my brothers you do to me." How we view and respond to those around us has not only political implications, but eternal consequences.

Lord, Teach Me How To Pray

2010-10-24T23:59:00.003-05:00

My nephew's wife was recently diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer of the breast. My sister's husband has been battling a progressive decline due to the onset of Parkinson's disease. The brother of My Love is undergoing both radiation and chemotherapy for cancer in the lymph nodes near his esophagus. The list goes on and on of family and friends who are suffering and struggling.

Family members close to them all are requesting prayers. "Please pray for healing for _____." "Pray that God will heal them of their disease." "Pray that they get better so that they can be restored to their family." "Pray that they can beat this so they can return to their work and support their loved ones."

All these pleas seem good, positive, natural in the circumstances. Who can argue with them?

Yet, I struggle. I hesitate. I flounder in forming my prayer. What is the best thing to pray for? I know what I would like to happen for each of them, but is that necessarily the best thing for them. Only God knows what they really need in their lives at this point.

There is a wonderful story from Early Christian oral tradition. Whether true or not, it illustrates my point. Following upon the raising of Lazarus from the dead in John's Gospel, this tradition says that Lazarus spent the rest of his life (he did have to die eventually!) with a look of sadness on his face. Never again did he smile for while his body was in the tomb for 3 days, he was enjoying the peace and joy of heaven. Then he had to come back to this life. This left him with a sad heart and a longing for eternity.

So how should I pray for those loved ones around me who are suffering and struggling? I do not want to, nor do I have the right to pray them into a reality that is not going to bring them true peace and joy. Only God can know what is in their best interest because only God has an eternal perspective.

Then it struck me. I can wholeheartedly pray that they come to know, to experience, to feel the great love that God has for them. For if they can come to realize the depth of God's love for them in every fiber of their beings, then they will be totally healed. Even if they are not cured of their physical maladies, they will be healed in the fullest sense.

So that has become my prayer: "Lord, touch them deeply with your love. Let them taste it, feel it, know it on every level of their being, in every relationship of their lives. Let them know that You Are God." With this prayer I am at peace because I know I have placed them in God's loving hands. What could be better than that?

We Are All God's People

2010-10-21T23:59:00.006-05:00

Tom was the son of Catholic parents and the product of twelve years of Catholic education. He grew up in the full knowledge and formation of his faith tradition and seemed comfortable with that.

However, some years after his marriage, Tom had a difference of opinion with the local pastor and withdrew from the Catholic faith community. Because he was still a faith-filled man, he raised his children in the knowledge and love of God, but without the support and participation of the local parish. As a caring and loving individual, Tom lived out his faith on a day-to-day basis, recognizing the beauty, sacredness and goodness of each person he met.

In his later years, Tom was diagnosed with a terminal illness. Although Tom himself was at peace with his relationship with God, it was his mother who contacted me with her concern that Tom "get himself straightened out" with the Catholic Church. She carried within herself the words of some long-since-dead priest whom she remembered as saying "Outside the Church there is no salvation." She worried about her son and was concerned for his eternal future.

We talked together for sometime as I focused on God's generous love and Tom's loving response during his many years as husband, father and neighbor. Fortunately God does not judge us as severely or harshly as we judge ourselves or one another. Nor is God confined to the limits that we place on His mercy and forgiveness.

Concerning Tom's membership (or lack thereof) in the Church, I pointed out to her the words of the great St Augustine (paraphrased here). In the fifth century, he said: "There are many whom God has that the Church does not; there are many whom the Church has that God does not." In other words, membership in the Church does not assure salvation, just as lack of membership does not preclude salvation. Fortunately for all of us, God sees a bigger picture than we humans are able to grasp.

Tom's future is obviously in God's hands. That is a good place for it to be since Tom knows God and is on a "first name basis" with Him. With this awareness, Tom's mother was also able to find peace in the situation. We have no responsibility, obligation nor competence to judge one another. Thanks be to God, that too is left in God's capable hands.

50th Class Reunion

2010-10-17T12:59:00.001-05:00

Recently I attended the 50th Reunion of my high school graduating class. It was a wonderful celebration with nearly half of the living members present, though some were more present than others.

Prior to the actual reunion, we had all been given the opportunity to submit an updated status report on our life. These writings were compiled into a booklet, a copy of which we all received at the banquet and dance. What follows is the summary which I sent in to fill everyone in on the happenings in my life since we graduated 50 years ago.

************************************

Choose Life

"I set before you Life and Death, the Blessing and the Curse. Choose Life then that you may live" (Deut 30:19). This scripture passage has been a guiding light for me over the last 50 years as I've tried to make the most life-giving choice at each opportunity.

Following graduation in 1960, I attended Loras College in Dubuque, Iowa, where I graduated in 1964 with a BA in Philosopy and a Minor in Education. I then continued my education at Mount St Bernard Seminary, completing my studies in 1968 with an MA in Theology and an MS Education from Creighton University.

After ordination to the priesthood, I served for 28 years in various northwest Iowa (Sioux City diocese) schools and parishes. Alongside those ministries, I was gifted with the opportunity to travel to Germany, Africa, India and the Philippines in order to work with diocesan priests developing their spirituality and fostering a supportive community within their dioceses.

My time in the priesthood culminated in 1995-96 when I journeyed to Bolivia to learn Spanish and work as a missionary in the jungles of northern Bolivia. From that distance, I was also able to gain a new perspective on my life and identify a change of focus for my ministry.

The nuanced call to Choose Life came in the form of my soon-to-be wife, Janella, whom I had known and worked with for more than 10 years. We were wed in June, 1996, after returning to the USA. Settling in southern Texas, we ministered jointly through our professions as Nursing Home Administrator and Admissions Coordinator. It was a blessed time during which we were able to assist people through a difficult period in their lives, both as residents and as care-giving families.

In July, 2008, after losing our home in Texas to the flood waters of Hurricane Dolly, we decided that the Lord was calling us to Choose Life back at our origins. So we moved back to Iowa in order to be near our parents and assist them in their final years. What a blessing it has been to be close by, to be a support to them.

We live outside Cherokee, Iowa, where we rent a small acreage beside the Little Sioux River. I work as the Business Manager at the local Ford Dealership -- a perfect "retirement" job. Our lives are simple, peaceful, filled with the joy and love that comes from Choosing Life.

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With that serving as an introduction, I am picking up my blog again by popular request. I will attempt to add reflections a couple of times each week in the vein of "Idle Ramblings of a Not-So-Idle Mind." If you have questions or comments, please direct them to me through either my email (address given on my profile) or in the comment section below.

Lent = Attitude

2010-03-02T00:01:00.001-06:00

We are into the second week of Lent already. So far the biggest penance has been putting up with the weather and all the cold, snow and blustery winds. But that has been a penance since early December! Now it is only ongoing...

Yet, as I have said so often over the years: Lent is something that happens to me. In other words, it is my attitude toward what enters into my life on a day to day basis that determines whether something is penance, pleasure, pain or passion. Life happens each day. How do I react to it? How do I welcome, or fight it? How do I let it affect me?

I often recall the words of St Teresa of Avila who said: "It is heaven all the way to heaven; it is hell all the way to hell." What she meant was that we decide whether what confronts us in life is positive or negative, whether it is life-giving or not. Our attitude, which is determined by our own decision, ultimately creates heaven or hell for us. Nobody else is responsible for our outlook on life, nor for our attitude in walking through it. We can't control the circumstances of our life, but we definitely can control what impact they have upon us. That control lies completely within the power of our choice of attitude.

How is your Lent going?

Never Stand When You Can Sit

2010-02-25T00:01:00.002-06:00

Yesterday I went to the doctor for a fasting blood test. After the nurse checked my pulse and blood pressure, she withdrew the requisite two viles of blood. Then there was a period of time, maybe four minutes, before the doctor came into the room.

Because it has always been my creed that you should "never stand when you can sit; never sit when you can lie down", I pulled out the footrest shelf on the exam table and laid down. I was in the midst of a relaxing rest when the doctor came in. It was a perfect "pause that was refreshing".

How many times in our day do we have two, three, four minutes between appointments, stuck in traffic, waiting for someone to show up, watching the meal bake in the oven or the laundry spin dry? In those moments we can rest and relax, breath deeply and pause in an awareness of the goodness of life, the nearness of the presence of God. Leaning back into the arms of God can bring immeasurable peace and refreshment in the midst of the hectic scramble of everyday life.

Such a simple practice with such profound results. What a habit to cultivate for better health, physical, emotional, and spiritual.

Whose Fault Is It?

2010-02-22T00:01:00.004-06:00

Over the weekend there were three headlines in the news that caught my eye:

1. Tiger Woods: Sorry For Behavior
2. Texas Man, Angry With IRS, Crashes Plane Into Office
3. Lawyer: Prof Accused in Ala Slayings Doesn't Remember Shootings

It goes without saying that all three of these situations are sad and tragic. The lives of many people have been negatively impacted by the actions of these three individuals; some have died, others have had their futures changed drastically in a very short period of time.

But what strikes me most with these unfortunate occurrences is how typical they are of a prevailing theme in our society, namely, choices and actions made without thought of consequences. It seems, in my humble opinion, that our society is afflicted with a cancerous growth which has infected the attitudes and behavior of people from the highest profile politicians to sports heroes to church leaders to teachers, parents and not surprisingly even down to children themselves. This growth has choked off the lifeblood to a vital part of our human person, our conscience. Without this "small voice within", we end up witnessing (and perhaps engaging in) behavior that is self destructive and socially harmful.

We revert to all kinds of excuses and rationale, blaming upbringing, addictions, our educational system (or lack thereof), friends and enemies. Yet, in the end, our choices are our own responsibility, no one else.

The power of our choices and the consequences that they carry with them is infinite in its ramifications. As God tells us through Moses in Deuteronomy: "I have set before you life and death, the blessing and the curse. Choose life, then, that you and your descendants may live by loving the Lord, your God, heeding his voice, and holding fast to him" (Deut 30:19-20). All around us, each day in the news headlines, we see examples of people who are making choices that are not life-giving, either to themselves or to those around them. Yet, somehow, in our modern society, we expect to be immune from the consequences of those choices. We believe that we are more enlightened than previous ages and hence free of the limitations and boundaries of human existence. How blind we are.

Lord, protect us from ourselves and our own blindness. Help us to see reality from Your perspective so that we can judge our own choices, actions and behaviors in the light of Your love. Awaken us to the full picture of the responsibility that goes with the powerful gift of making choices.

Spring Will Come!

2010-02-17T00:01:00.003-06:00

With this being Ash Wednesday and the beginning of Lent, I decided that it is a good time to get back to the practice of writing my blog with some regularity. There is a healthy discipline in putting my thoughts down in a readable, and hopefully sensible format, both for myself and, maybe even for others.

The word "Lent" comes from an old English word meaning "Spring". If ever there was a winter that begged for the coming of that season of renewal and rebirth, it is this one. Snow upon snow, moved around by wind after wind, followed by cold, clouds, fog and occasional sunshine have tested the mettle of many a hearty soul these past months. Even the toughest of the tough are ready for a break as cabin fever surpasses the common cold as the illness of conversation.

Two weeks ago, a woman who had moved here to the Midwest from her native country of The Philippines, came into our auto dealership to have her car serviced. She commented on the severity of the winter we are experiencing. As I commiserated with her by telling her that it was severe even by the standards of those who grew up in Iowa, I was able to offer her a little hope. I told her that in the 68 winters that I had lived, there has never been one that was not followed by spring at some point. I expected that this one would be no exception.

But when, on this past Monday, I became stuck in a snow drift on our country road and required assistance from our neighbor to get pulled out, I knew that I too was ready for spring. Lent is the season to remind us that change, new life, rebirth is available to us if we only acknowledge our limitations, our imperfections, our inability to "pull ourselves out" of the mess we are in. When we accept being "stuck in the drift", Lent can happen to us again, and new life can spring forth in the depths of our hearts. May this Lent be such a time for all of us.

What Is The Message?

2009-10-15T00:01:00.003-05:00

Waking up on October 10, on October 12 and again yesterday, October 14, to a covering of snow on the ground is not my idea of Fall in Iowa! If this were December or January, it would be beautiful with the light, fluffy, white stuff gently drifting down and decorating the trees in the yard. But this is just too early!

I think of my Uncle Norbert, with his wonderful sense of humor, saying: "There must be somebody new at the weather controls up there. You know, we had that funeral last week of ___________, and I'll be they're the one in charge now!" It surely seems like things are "out of control" lately as we note the weather happenings all around the world.

Whether you subscribe to the global warming position or not, it is difficult not to see the extremely unusual weather occurrences and begin to wonder what is happening. From a faith perspective, I believe that God is trying to get our attention. From God's viewpoint, it is not nature that is "out of control". It is we humans who seem to have "lost it". Once God has our attention, if we are ready to listen, there will be Good News awaiting us.

Does God have your ear yet?

Touched By The Holy

2009-10-13T00:01:00.003-05:00

From 1974 to 1996, I was blessed with opportunities to travel in foreign countries. In Africa, India and the Philippines, I interacted with native priests, gave them retreats, lived in their homes and moved about in their parishes. Although I was handicapped by a lack of knowledge of their native languages, yet we were able to communicate in English and so we could establish some bonds.

This inability to converse in a native tongue led me to Bolivia where I studied Spanish and spent nearly a year in the Bolivian culture. What a great difference in understanding a people when you can "speak their language"!

Now these many years later, in reflecting on those experiences, several things have become very clear to me. Once a person has been graced by being picked up by the hair and transported out of their comfort zone, nothing is ever the same. When that transport includes living in another culture, life is changed forever because one has been Touched by the Holy (like Isaiah 6). Only the Holy is God's People experienced in that other culture.

Or to put it in another Biblical image, like Moses before the Burning Bush, one learns to "take off your shoes, for the ground on which you walk is holy ground" (Exodus 3:5). When we learn to approach another person, another people, another culture as we approach the Holy, then our lives are changed, we are transformed, we are blessed.

Fortunately, it is not necessary to leave this country to experience the Holy in this manner. This grace is available each time we meet another person, whether on the street, in the grocery store or in our own family. God is present, desiring to lift us out of our comfort zone and move us into the Divine Presence in every personal encounter we have. Only our own prejudices and fixed mindsets can prevent us from recognizing the Holy One standing before us.

Are you ready to be transported out of your comfort zone so you can be touched by Holy?

No Toasted Marshmallows!

2009-09-29T00:01:00.001-05:00

Ancient peoples spoke of the four main elements of the universe: earth, air, water and fire. These elements were the basis of life and were necessary to sustain that life. We've all experienced and appreciated the peace and renewal that comes from sitting quietly beside a body of water, be it a pond, lake or ocean. Something deep within is touched and rejuvenated as we let our spirits be healed.

Thanks to the generosity of Mike and Jane, we have been blessed with a housewarming gift for Shack Too. They presented us with an electric firebox and mantle for a fireplace. With a little time and some pieces of lumber, I was able to build a framework for the fireplace, as you see in the photo below.

Then I glued sections of imitation rock to the frame, both around the firebox, and at the bottom of the hearth. Behold! We have a beautiful fireplace in our home.

Sitting by the fireplace with a good book, or just relaxing with My Love -- that is about as wonderful a way to be in touch with God as is possible at home. Life is gift and God is Good!

Gratitude List

2009-09-22T09:17:00.004-05:00

Time to post a new Gratitude List -- things for which I am especially thankful today.

1. My Love is alive and safe. On Sunday evening, while driving into town for Bible Study, our car hit loose gravel, went out of control and plowed into an embankment. After climbing up the hill, it flipped onto its right side, swung around and landed back on the wheels. Thank you, God, she was wearing her seat belt and is only suffering from bumps and bruises. With extensive damage sustained, the future of the car is uncertain at this writing. The insurance adjuster is expected sometime today.

2. A fun weekend with friends and relatives. On Saturday we traveled to the home of John and Jan for good food and relaxing company. Also present were Darold and Sondra and Denny and Linda. Following our delicious dinner, we guys proceeded to give the girls a lesson in Joker, beating them 3-2 games. A good time was had by all.

3. Shack Too is shaping up. In between times we have been able to get pictures hung, boxes unpacked, shelves put up and sundry things placed. It is definitely feeling and looking like home. Over the weekend, our landlord put the deck outside our walkout lower level. Now we are able to sit outside and enjoy the beauty of the world around us. (This morning there were 4 deer walking through the bean field just outside our front door.) To attract the wildlife closer, we have hung a couple of bird feeders, a squirrel wheel, and a block of salt for the deer.

4. Our small faith/bible sharing group has been studying and reflecting on Change -- how we view it, respond to it and grow through it. What a tremendous gift to have faith-filled friends to walk the road with because change is constant. Only our attitude makes it a blessing or a curse. When we see through the eyes of faith, God is leading at every turn.

So, once again, it is time to says "Thanks, God, for all the blessings, in whatever form they appear. We welcome them with open arms and grateful hearts."

Too Long Gone

2009-09-17T13:46:00.003-05:00

Too long since my last post, so it's time for some idle meanderings.

With all the hubbub of moving and trying to get settled in, time at home has been at a premium. Add to that the additional attention required for the care of parents and you have the present reality of "not being as far along in the process" as we had hoped. We are still in that "I know I saw it someplace, but I don't remember where it is" state. We have no difficulty locating items that we are not searching for. But those that we need are sometimes proving elusive. Yet, slowly progress is being made as we put our stamp on Shack Too.

Outside the bean fields are turning from vibrant green to golden yellow to crisp brown. At the same time the trees are beginning to lose their leaves, some after changing colors, others dropping in their summer hews. While the beauty is glorious, I find it a bit depressing because of what is to follow before very long. I am not yet ready to face winter.

Another benefit we have been blessed with through our move is: Leroy! Leroy is a dog. He belongs to our landlord, who previously lived in the house we are now renting. Hence, Leroy thinks that our house is his home as much as the one across the road where his master resides. So we have the blessing of a dog without the responsibility! He is lovable, appreciates a scratch behind the ears, and is always ready to relieve us of our table scraps. What more could we want!

In the midst of all these happenings, we continue to thank God for leading us to this place of peace and quiet. The gift of nature surrounding us puts us immediately in contact with the Divine whether we are walking outside, or merely looking out the windows. How blessed we are.

Home At Last

2009-09-04T00:01:00.000-05:00

For thirteen months My Love and I hung our hats in a comfortable little apartment in Meriden, Iowa. For those same months, we carried our groceries and laundry up and down the 23 steps to the second level. During that time we ate, slept, relaxed and paid our rent. We were content and satisfied.

But it was never home!

Now we are five days in our new location in the country. We are still in the process of unpacking boxes and looking for different items of importance. Then, after finding them, to relocate them later! Yet, with all the chaos and disruption, it is already home! In all the moves that I have made in my life (and there were MANY of them), in none of them have I felt so at home so quickly. I could not feel anymore at home if we owned this piece of property.

What is it that makes a place into a home? Why is it that one place can be only a place to live, while another is a place of renewal and life?

One thing I am able to put my finger on is the sense of belonging. This location is a good fit for both My Love and me. It nourishes our spirits and feeds our hearts as we soak in the presence of God in the surroundings, both outside and within. Whether we are merely looking out the windows, or walking in the yard, we are breathing in New Life.

Truly we feel blessed as we begin this phase of our journey here in the Valley of the Little Sioux River.

Natural Refreshment

2009-09-01T00:01:00.001-05:00

It is impossible to exaggerate the renewal of life that has come with our move to the country! Just stepping outdoors, breathing in the fresh air, and soaking in the peacefulness of the surroundings is enough to remove any burdens, worries or concerns that may be present. We are at home in Shack Too!

Thanks to the able-bodied assistance of Jim, John, Larry and Jeannie, My Love and I began about 9:00 am last Saturday morning loading the remaining furniture, boxes and clothes. In about 2 hours, everything was packed into the four pickups, two trailers and one car for the 15 minute drive to our little corner of paradise. In a lot less time than it took to load it all up, we removed everything from our vehicles and placed it in piles inside the house, hopefully somewhere close to their ultimate landing spot.

Then we took time out to renew our strength with the delicious food that My Love had prepared beforehand. Along with Jeannie's fresh-baked cinnamon rolls and apple braid, our first meal in the new house became a virtual banquet. Fine food and good friends in a gorgeous setting -- what more could anyone desire!

Now we are in the process of sorting through the maze of boxes, finding locations for all our treasures, and just soaking in the New Life that we have been given. How awesome and wonderful is our God! When we left Texas just a little more than a year ago, we had no energy and less interest in becoming enthused about where we hung our hats. Now we are excited, energetic and reinvigorated as we "settle in and take possession of this land that the Lord our God" has given us. Blessed be His Name!

C4C

2009-08-25T10:41:00.003-05:00

For the past two weeks, I have been scurrying with several projects in my life. Hence the hiatus here on the blog. But, lest you think that I have died, today brings a brief respite and the opportunity to share some random, if disconnected items.

As the Business Manager at our car dealership, I have been chosen to be the contact person for the Cash For Clunkers government program. Under this initiative, we have sold 10 new vehicles, removed 10 "clunkers" from the road, and buried ourselves in mounds of paperwork. After one month of involvement (our first deal was done on July 25), we have yet to receive our first payment of the promised $3500/4500 for each deal consummated. (Today there is a rumor that at least half of the 625,000 deals done in the country will be reimbursed by the end of September!)

I have refrained from getting political in this blog. But I have to say that if the management of this government program is any indication, a government-managed healthcare program would be a disaster. Yet, I am afraid that in the present situation, doing nothing would even be more catastrophic.

Item #2: We are getting VERY EXCITED about our impending move to the country. We are in the process of moving smaller items each day as we travel to Shack Too. However, the BIG MOVE will take place this coming Saturday. Several relatives and friends have volunteered to assist us in the transfer of the larger furniture that day, and we anticipate sleeping in our new home for the first time that evening. The cleaning, fixing and painting are moving ahead on schedule. We look forward to being neighbors to our new landlords who have been wonderful in preparing the place for our impending occupation.

As we have had the opportunity to visit and work out there, we have been deeply touched and moved by the peace and quiet. It takes but a few moments to become aware of the awesome presence of God all around. Stay tuned for pictures after we are settled in.

God's Timing

2009-08-12T08:25:00.004-05:00

Last evening we spent time at Shack Too working alongside Kevin and Hallie, our new landlords. We were cleaning, stripping wallpaper from the bathroom walls, and preparing the house for painting. It was a thrilling, albeit tiring evening.

Over the last week, My Love has also been busy following up on the local radio station's Swap Shop, a daily listing of items people are offering for sale. We have been fortunate enough to purchase 2 like-new refrigerators, 1 freezer, plus matching Maytag washer and dryer. We are nearly prepared, as far as appliances are concerned, for our relocation. Only an electric stove is still needed.

The excitement of getting things ready for this move has truly taken hold of both of us. Somehow the timing is right. One year ago, when we arrived here in Iowa, we had neither the desire nor the energy to undertake such a rental location with a yard and all its upkeep. Now it is exciting to be enthused about the possibilities of our little paradise in the country. Truly, God's timing is everything. As one of my friends was accustomed to say: "God is never in a hurry. But He is also never late." We are witness to the truth of that statement. With grateful hearts.

Spirit Grazing

2009-08-07T00:01:00.000-05:00

Each day going to and from work, I pass by a small pasture populated with three beautiful riding horses. They move easily from one end of the field to the other, eating their fill of the lush grass which this cool, wet summer has produced. I have never seen anyone attending to them, or riding them, yet they seem content.

Yesterday as I passed by, I reflected on their typical day. They go from one end of the field to the other, not by a decision to journey that set distance, but by nibbling one bunch of grass after another. This process is called grazing. They meander from this luscious mouthful of grass to the next one, then to the next one until lo and behold, here they are at the opposite side of the field.

How like our journey with the Lord. We respond to the Spirit today, in this situation. That leads us to tomorrow where we again respond to the Spirit in the circumstances of that day. As all the tomorrows pass from todays into yesterdays, we awaken at some point to the realization that we are now at a place that we would never have chosen if it had been presented to us in the beginning. Our grazing in the Spirit takes us to new lands, new relationships, new realities which are more blessed and more wonderful than anything that we could have planned for ourselves.

As I have listened to our friends, Gail and Marilyn, as they have been celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary, I have heard them say that when they spoke their vows to each other 50 years ago, they never imagined that it would bring them to their present reality. They did not choose their present situation 50 years ago, but rather they grazed with the Spirit down through the years. Now they awaken to find themselves in the loving arms of God as they are in the loving arms of each other.

So, graze on, my friends. Know that God will surprise you by taking you on a path unknown to you. A blessed path.

Shack Too

2009-08-04T11:35:00.004-05:00

Last evening we were presented with the opportunity to view our own little piece of paradise. Shack Too is a small home located on about three acres of land overlooking the Little Sioux river four miles northeast of Cherokee. Nearly two acres are wooded, providing us with ample opportunities for wildlife, including various bird species, deer and coyotes. Hiking in the area will definitely be a possibility.

The owners, Kevin and Hallie, are as excited to rent to us as we are to be their neighbors across the road. They are a working couple who share a love and commitment to rodeo. She is the secretary for the Bull Riders Association and Kevin is a judge of bull riding events. This interest takes them on many travels around the country where they can also watch their son, Alan, who is a rodeo clown.

Since we are required to give a 30-day notice to our present landlord (which we have done!), we will be assisting Kevin and Hallie the next few weeks to clean, paint and get Shack Too ready. We hope to move in before the end of the month.

So why Shack Too? Because we expect to find God there also in even more ways than we already have. We believe that this location is a gift from a loving God who is drawing us out there to reveal to us even more God's care for us. We are looking forward with great excitement and anticipation to this new venture on the journey to the Kingdom. Stay tuned.

Learn The Lesson

2009-07-30T00:01:00.003-05:00

Lately I've been pondering the fact that so many of the people I know -- family and friends -- are going through terrific struggles/challenges. Some are health challenges, some are emotional difficulties, some are financial adversities. But they are all very real and very painful.

It is possible to affirm that God is present with them in the struggles. It is possible in faith to know that "everything works together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purposes." (Romans 8:28) I can posit these things, but somehow that doesn't answer all the questions that come up in the actual going-through-the-struggle episodes.

I have come to the conclusion that there is another dimension to this whole reality. I have come to believe that God uses these struggles to teach us some lesson(s). That is not to say that God causes these illnesses or adversities. Only that God uses them to show us new realities, new dimensions in our lives.

It might be that I need to recognize that I am not in control of my life. Even though I proclaim my dependence on God, sometimes I live as though I am in charge. Therefore, from time to time I need to be reminded Who is really in the driver's seat.

Maybe what I need to learn is how to ask for help from others. In my idea of myself, sometimes I see me as self-sufficient, able to get along without the support and assistance of others. Here my pride comes into the picture. It is rather humbling to have to ask someone else to do for me what (I think) I should be able to do for myself.

Perhaps God is trying to change my priorities. Maybe the lesson plan for me is to reveal my mixed up hierarchy of important things. What I see as number one may not be so for God. God could be telling me to slow down, take more time for prayer because all the running around that I am doing is all being done to avoid facing God in my life.

One thing I have learned: God wants me for relationship with the Godhead. Everything else is secondary to that. My health, my finances, my home, my job, my whatever is dispensable if it comes between me and God.

Whatever the lesson(s) God wants to teach me, the sooner I learn them, the sooner my life can move on. That doesn't mean that my life will get back to what it was before because, as my friend Gail says, once we have come face to face with God, nothing is ever the same. But if I am slow, or refuse to learn the lesson, then the Teacher finds it necessary to prolong the class. So my mantra is to learn as quickly as possible.

What lesson is God teaching you at this point in your life?

One Year Later

2009-07-24T00:01:00.002-05:00

It was a year ago yesterday that Hurricane Dolly blew in upon us with her not-too-friendly "Hello!" And it was one year ago today that we awoke to water coming in around the foundation of our home. That day saw us journey from frantic, frenetic activity in attempting to salvage our home and its belongings to quiet, exhausted acceptance of its loss. You can read more of the details in two former blogs, And the Waters Came and Then Came the Angels.

Today we find ourselves comfortably settled back in Iowa, surrounded by family whom we are enjoying immensely. As I have written so many times previously, the blessing of being with loved ones can only be appreciated by those who have been apart from them for a significant time. The opportunity that has been afforded us through this move can only be understood as a backhanded gift of a loving God.

As we have been approaching this anniversary of our water upheaval, I have vacillated between gratitude for the new life that we have been gifted with here in Iowa, and a renewed sense of loss for our South Texas home and life. Not that I want to go back. But this one-year time of recollection seems to be necessary to bring the past to some sort of closure.

In the midst of reflections on the past year, which in some respects has passed rather quickly, and in other ways seems to have been eons long, God seems to be moving again. We are investigating a move to a rental home out in the country. The possibility of enjoying the beauty of nature and the privacy of the country tugs at us very strongly. God seems to be opening a door in that direction. We will see where it leads. Stay tuned.

Down Memory Lane

2009-07-21T00:01:00.001-05:00

Sunday was a perfect day for an outing. With sunshine, temperatures in the upper 70s, and a light breeze, nature was calling to come out and play.

So My Love and I packed up a delicious dinner and left mid morning to visit my Mother. When she came home from church, she found us in her kitchen preparing some of her favorite dishes, like scrumptious meatloaf, sweetcorn on the cob, garden fresh tomatoes and broccoli and cauliflower salad. This was followed up by sweet, ripe watermelon and cantaloupe with my Mother's own oatmeal logs as a kicker. Makes my mouth water again just to write about it!

Such a delicious meal demanded a short rest afterwards. Then with Mom in tow, we headed out for a tour of the countryside. For years we have traveled the road between Willey and Dedham with Mom commenting: "I grew up on a farm over there and drove 6 miles to school by horse and buggy." But I had never seen the "farm over there". So we retraced the journey she took each day to and from school. As we went up and down the hills, Mom pointed out farm places, detailing which families occupied them years ago. Many of the farmsteads are no longer standing. Finally we reached the corner where she spent most of her youth. The original home still houses a family, though with some additions and moderations. Mom regaled us with some of the activities that occupied their time during her youth. When I commented that I had never been by here before, she said that it had been "at least 50 years" since she had been there.

From there we traveled to Roselle to visit the cemetery and the graves of her parents and her brother, Norbert. We had been there several years ago, but it was time to return and touch base with some of our family roots.

Then we headed across the countryside to Wall Lake to visit the grave of Mom's brother, Gilbert, who died two years ago. From there we circled Blackhawk Lake, recalling memories of my childhood when we would visit the lake on a Sunday afternoon to swim or enjoy fireworks.

Finally we returned to Mom's home in time for supper. After the day's enjoyable trek down memory lane, we were renewed and relaxed, ready for a good night's sleep. My Love and I made our own journey home, grateful for another experience of God's blessings, for the chance to spend time with Mom and enjoy her company. As we come this week to the one-year anniversary of the hurricane striking our home in Texas, we look back upon so many gifts of God's love that have been ours in these past twelve months, gifts that would not be ours except for the push that Dolly gave us. Thank you, God.

Fields of Memories

2009-07-17T00:01:00.004-05:00

I love this time of the year. Driving down the road with the corn fields beginning to tassel, the (few) oats fields turning brown as they ripen for the harvest, the fresh-mowed hay lying in neat windrows, and the bean fields covering the ground with their lush green bushes -- it is impossible to miss the abundant love of God surrounding us.

As a youngster, this was the season when I began to work on the farm with my uncles and grandpa. At age 10, I began to drive the tractor on the bundle wagons as the neighbors gathered together to thresh the oats. We young boys would steer the tractors between the rows of shocked oats as the men pitched the bundles into the hay racks. Then, when the rack was full, we would pull up to the threshing machine where the men would pitch them into the feeder. Sometimes, when we stopped for lunch or dinner, while the men were resting, we boys would be engaged in various forms of entertainment. It was not unknown that a simple drink of water could turn into a cooling water fight. Those among us who were a little more mischievous would climb up on one of the racks and tie some of the bundles together. This would make it very difficult, if not impossible for the man whose load it was to pitch them into the threshing machine. It was a carefree time with no concerns or worries beyond the fun of the day.

In later years, I worked with those same uncles in their hybrid seed corn fields. This was the season to bring in the detasseling crews to pull the tassels from the female rows so that the cross pollination could happen. Teenage boys and girls from the surrounding area would walk up and down the rows yanking out all the tassels in the assigned rows. It was my first lesson in the work ethic. I discovered that some people were hard workers, efficient and steady, while others either could not see the tassels or chose to overlook them. I remember especially one character whose nickname was "Blackie" (not because of any racial implications. After all, we were all white kids who had never encountered a black person.) who pulled tassels all the way across the field, carrying them all with him as he went. When he reached the far end of the field, he laid them all out on the ground making himself a comfortable bed, and proceeded to take a long nap. When we finally found him several hours later, he was given an early ride home.

It was a season of first loves. Many of the female detasslers stole my heart as I fell head over heels for them, at least for a week or two. Some of them even paid special attention to this young town-kid-in-the-country.

Every small town in the area had a men's fast pitch softball team. Once or twice each week we would attend the local game. At the end of the season, there would be a celebration for the team and all the followers. The menu would be bushels of cooked corn-on-the-cob, a big cauldron of melted butter, and lots of beer. If one was old enough to pronounce the name of a beer, it could be had.

All these memories, and more, come to mind now as I drive past the fields in all their verdant beauty. After being away from Iowa for the last 15 years, the rolling elegance of the abundant crops assures me that life goes on. Generations come and go. People live and die. But God continues to bless our land and the people who tend it. God's faithfulness is evident to those who have eyes to see. And hearts to be grateful.

Witness to Love II

2009-07-14T00:01:00.002-05:00

They arrived on Friday evening with bags, crutches and hugs. Then the celebrations began. Gail and Marilyn, our friends from Idaho and members of our morning bible study, had arrived from Omaha where they were visiting at their daughter's home. How excited we were to welcome them to our Iowa world after having hosted them in Texas several years ago.

We spent Friday evening and all day Saturday sharing, laughing, praying, eating and enjoying one another. Gail had sprained a ligament in his left ankle, so his mobility was somewhat limited. However, he had no difficulty climbing up our stairs on his hands and knees, and then descending on his backside. It was wonderful that he cleaned our steps for us!

Gail and Marilyn had traveled to Omaha to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary at their daughter's with friends from Nebraska. On Sunday, they gathered for a Mass, food and festivities with about 20 family and friends. To prepare for that event, they came to visit us. While with us, we helped them write their renewal of marriage vows, expressing what they truly wanted to from their hearts. For some pictures of that gala event, go to Greetings From Nebraska: Anniversary Mass & Party.

After spending this sacred time with them, I am able to say that I have truly seen God. When two people as different as Gail and Marilyn can come together in marriage and remain together for this many years, it is due to one thing only, the Spirit of God. Only God could take two human beings with such different personalities and temperaments and make them one while at the same time respecting those differences.

When Philip came to Jesus and said: "Show us the Father. Then it will be enough for us"...Jesus responded: "To have seen me is to have seen the Father" (John 14:8, 9). In other words, God is present in concrete form in Jesus.

Today Jesus would respond: "To see Gail and Marilyn is to see the Father." They are the concrete form of God in our midst today. For that we are grateful, to God for his fidelity and to Gail and Marilyn for their response to God's movement of grace over these many years.

My Love and I are most grateful to them for choosing to share part of that celebration with us. It gave us the opportunity to present them with a print out of the blog that I had written about them last May, along with all the responses of those who love them. Their Witness to Love is an encouragement and a sacrament to us of God's goodness and faithfulness. As God has kept his promise to them, so he will also do for us. And for all of you.

Total Disrespect

2009-07-11T00:01:00.001-05:00

What makes people act the way they do? What leads them to behave in a manner that is lower than an animal? That is truly senseless?

We are looking to rent a small, 2-bedroom home with a laundry and no stairs to climb. So, following an inquiry, we journeyed to an acreage just outside of town. The landlord, an elderly gent who walked with a rolling walker, let us into the house that had been rented until recently to a young man and his live-in companion.

What we found inside the house made us sick. There were holes knocked into the sheet rock in several rooms. A dart board had been drawn on the wall of the living room, and, from the puncture marks, had obviously been used quite a bit. Empty beer and whiskey bottles littered the floors. Several doors had been kicked off the hinges and broken. One kitchen cupboard door was missing, and in the cupboard we found a small plastic bag of some kind of white powder. The basement was littered with dog droppings. Outside we saw a burn pile with the remnants of the garage door amidst the ashes. Someone had totally trashed the property.

The owner informed us that the young man who had rented it was behind bars in the local jail for violating his parole. Whatever he was on parole for was unknown.

Which leaves me with the opening questions. What is it that generates such actions, such disregard for the property of others? I can only think that somehow it involves a complete lack of respect for self. Whatever his background, he cannot have any healthy sense of self-respect and perform in such a manner. His destructive actions are ultimately self-destructive as evidenced by his present residence in jail.

I certainly find myself feeling sadness for the landlord, who is now stuck with a property that he cannot rent out without a sizable investment in repairs. From his physical condition, he is unable to do the work himself, so will need to hire it done.

Those repair costs will need to be passed along to any future renters, even responsible, respectful ones. Herein lies the community effects of sin. Others are touched by the sin of one individual.

Finally, I feel sorry for the young man who perpetrated these actions. To be so unhappy with self and with life to act in this way is truly lamentable. Not that he should not be held accountable and suffer the consequences of his behavior. But, what a waste of a human life and God-given potential.

Then I recall the words of St Paul: "Just as through one man's disobedience all became sinners, so through one man's obedience all shall become just" (Romans 5:19). Jesus died for this young man also. He just does not realize it yet and has not accepted it yet. My task at this point is to not let my own disgust, anger, frustration with his actions influence my own loving response to life. I cannot let his disrespect for himself, others and life become my own through subtle resentment or hidden bitterness. My calling is to love him and forgive him, if only from a distance. I can do that without understanding him or knowing the reasons for his behavior. I only need to open myself to the action of the Spirit of God. That is my prayer for today.

Michael Jackson?

2009-07-09T00:01:00.002-05:00

All of the muss, fuss, fanfare and hoopla of the last two weeks following the death of Michael Jackson has me scratching my head and wondering, "Are we really that crazy as a society?" I mean, have we really strayed so far afield that this person has come to epitomize our values, our hopes, our dreams and our goals?

That he was a success as an entertainer no one would argue. That he introduced some new elements of dance and singing into the pop scene are without question.

Whether he was a success as a human being can certainly be called into question. His predilection for children, especially young boys is not something to be idolized or imitated. I mean, Mothers, would you want him to babysit your small children? The fact that he either settled charges out of court, or was not found guilty does not alter the perception of his secret behaviors. Then there is his seeming discomfort with his own racial identity. His attempts to blur or dull his "blackness" seem to indicate a person who would rather be someone else. This does not seem to be an individual to be held up for emulation.

Yet, the overwhelming adulation and gushing from both ordinary people and media types call for pause and questioning on all our parts. What does this say about our society? About us as a people? Is this the best we can do when holding someone up as a model for others, especially our young people?

I remember when Elvis Presley died in 1977. There was a woman in her 70's who was cleaning and cooking in the rectory where I was living. She was in tears for almost a week because "the King is dead". I thought it was strange at that time; I still think it strange as I look back upon it. Even though there have been many "sightings" of Elvis since that time, he has never come back. I suspect that the same thing will happen with Michael Jackson.

Maybe I am just "out of touch" with the real world!?! Or maybe I just cannot forget that Jesus is the only one who said that He would come back again. Maybe I keep remembering what Jesus said to Satan when he tempted Jesus following His 40-day fast in the desert: "Scripture has it: 'You shall do homage to the Lord your God; him alone shall you adore.'" (Matt 5:10) Somehow I think the world will move on, the sun will rise again tomorrow and music will play in the hearts of all people. Michael has died. May he rest in peace.

July 4th Family Gathering

2009-07-07T00:01:00.003-05:00

What a good looking group gathered together for the annual July 4th picnic at Don & Kate's. With the overcast skies, picture taking was excellent.Maria and Camille earned the prize for traveling the farthest to attend. How Camille has grown! What an active little wiggler she is, twisting, turning, bending and moving. She has the makings of becoming either a gymnast or a pretzel.

It's not easy being a super host, cooking great tasting burgers and brats, and at the same time managing to stay cool, calm and collected with all the hubbub around. But Don did it.

Grandpa Gerald, Jim and his son Alex enjoyed some outdoor time after filling themselves up on the wonderful dishes prepared for the occasion.

With all the opportunities for visiting and catching up, everyone agreed that the day was a super success. Our gratitude to Don and Kate for making possible this gathering of the clan. My Love and I appreciated the chance to be a part of this memorable tradition. Here's looking forward to next year.

Potluck Picnic

2009-07-04T00:01:00.002-05:00

Where are your fireworks this year? In a nearby town? By a lake? Out in the backyard? Or in your heart?

Since this is our first 4th of July in Iowa, we are thrilled to have the opportunity to join with other members of the family for the traditional picnic at the home of My Love's brother, Don. While in Texas, we heard each year about the wonderful and enjoyable time everyone had, tasting all the great food dishes on the potluck table and swapping lies.

We will be taking with us My Love's parents who have been annual participants for many years. When they lived in Texas with us, it was always understood that they would embark on their trek north to Iowa in time to be present for this Jefferson, SD, gathering. So, they will be functioning as "guides" to show us newcomers the ropes.

What a beautiful way to spend a day: giving thanks for our freedoms and our families. We will also be praying for those who are protecting our freedom in far away places, and sacrificing their own family time while they do it.

Finally, we will be praying for our nation, that we can return to the faith and family values upon which we were founded. May God bless us all. We need it.

Winner or Loser?

2009-07-02T09:16:00.003-05:00

If the saying "It takes all kinds to make the world go 'round" has any truth to it, it is in the car business. Each person that comes through the door looking for a vehicle is as unique and different from every other one as is possible.

Recently we had a customer who was shopping (for several months actually) for a car for his wife. He had found one that she liked here at our dealership. Now it was just a matter of negotiating an acceptable price.

During the process of negotiation and subsequent sale, one thing became very clear. This fellow had framed his world in a win-lose mold. Every situation, every encounter was defined in such a way that someone would be dominant and the other would be subservient. He was bound and determined to be the one who exerted the power and others were required to cowtow to him. It was not enough that he got most of what he wanted in the process, he had to have all of what he wanted or he was unhappy because he had not really won. For him, the only important thing was winning, dominating, getting his way.

I have thought of him often since that encounter. What an unhappy way to structure reality. What a miserable way to live. To set up life in such a way that there is always a winner and a loser guarantees that in every situation half the people are going to be dissatisfied, half the people are left unhappy.

Fortunately, God does not operate in that framework with us. When we set things up in a win-lose scenario, God draws a bigger circle and makes it possible for everyone to win. In St Paul's letter to the Romans, we are told: "God makes all things work together for good for those who love God, those who are called according to his purposes" (8:28). So even when we may feel like we are on the losing end of the stick, we simply need to re-focus our eyes to see with the vision of faith that God is at work to bring about something even better.

What is your framework for viewing the reality of your life? Are you a winner? Is everyone around you?

Serenity Prayer

2009-06-30T00:01:00.001-05:00

In a previous reflection, I wrote about My Dad. The Serenity Prayer was his favorite prayer. It is also one that has occupied my attention frequently in the last few months. We have a beautiful cross-stitch framed rendition of this hanging on the wall in our apartment. It was a gift from a friend in south Texas. So I thought that I would post a meditation on that prayer today.

The prayer is very simple. It goes as follows:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.

God, grant me (in other words, God, I recognize that I cannot do this on my own. This is something that you need to do for me, in me. I cannot give myself anything because everything comes from you. I certainly cannot give myself the life that I want or desire. Please, Lord, grant me...)

Serenity (I mean that peacefulness of heart that doesn't get shook up by every passing wind or whim. This is that calmness that is deep within, that is not dependent on the approval of others, the rise or fall of the stock market, the mood swings of others or myself, or the weather reports or forecast. God, this is the "peace that is beyond all understanding".)

To accept (not just put up with, not just grin and bear it, not just grit my teeth and wait for it to be over. But really allow it to be without fighting against it, without getting angry or frustrated, without letting it drain my energies.)

The things I cannot change (Oh my, are there ever so many parts of this world that I cannot change: the weather, the attitudes and prejudices of others, the price of groceries or gas, the behavior of my spouse, family or friends, not to mention my neighbors or strangers. This list could go on and on...limited only by my imagination.)

The courage (it really does take courage because of all the resistance that I will run into. This is not for the faint-hearted.) to change the things I can. (Sometimes it is easier to just let things go the way they are going. To really stand up and try to change the status quo is threatening to anyone who has a vested interest in the way things are right now. I remember my Mother saying to me in the past "Someone should really do/say something about that...." When I responded, "Why don't you do something since you noticed it", she was a bit taken aback. However, after a while, she began to DO something. It is not easy to actually confront the realities of our everyday existence and effect change. Sometimes problems and situations seem overwhelming. Frustration with our inability to accomplish REAL change also leads us to give up after a while. So there is a real need for the courage to keep plugging along.)

And the wisdom to know the difference (It does take wisdom, which in the biblical understanding is right doing, right action based upon discernment. Only a truly wise person can distinguish between the battles that need to be fought and those that are a waste of time and energy. So many times I find myself expending energy on issues or problems that are going nowhere. Lord, give me the wisdom I need to tell the difference between those things that you want me to bury myself in, and those that either belong to someone else, or are not worth the effort.)

As I continue to reflect on this prayer, I see the great freedom there is in being able to live it on a day to day basis. How much more energy and life I would have available if I could only enflesh this prayer in my heart and mind.

Which of the parts of this prayer do you find most easy for you? Which is the most difficult? Where do you want to go from here?

Peace Of Mind

2009-06-27T00:01:00.002-05:00

Speakers at some goal-setting workshops that I have attended in the past often posed the question: If money was no object, what would you do with your life? In other words, if I did not have to concern myself with making a living, how would I spend my time, what would I want to accomplish, where would I choose to focus my energies. This question was designed to help get in touch with deep-seated dreams, desires and longings so that they could begin to become reality.

As I reflect on that question in light of the past year and where we are today, I see it all from a different perspective. What a difference a year makes!

Last November, My Love's sister, Annette, and her husband, Jim, moved from their home in Larrabee to Maryhill. They put their home on the market. We prayed. It did not sell. Now they are joyfully fixing up the house and this weekend will be moving back into it. God heard our prayer by not letting the house sell, thereby making this comfortable return possible.

We continue to spend time with My Love's parents as we navigate the process of her Dad's deteriorating dementia. However now other members of the family are becoming involved with the care-giving by being present for a few days or even a week at a time. What a gift it is for all concerned to have this time together, to support one another, and to build even more family memories. As I've stated before, the general direction of this whole process is rather clear, but the particular steps of the journey have yet to be worked out.

What has become clear to me in these processes is that peace and contentment have been very deep so long as I am living in the present moment. As long as I am just being open to God's presence and action in each day and whatever it brings, I can remain undisturbed. Insofar as I can accept whatever each situation presents to me, I then move through it with equanimity.

Only if I begin to focus on how I want things to be other than they are do I start to become upset or dissatisfied. Only when my will gets at cross purposes with God's will does my life begin to unravel around the edges, and sometimes in the middle. Want and desire, when not in conformity with Divine Purposes, are the seeds of destruction. At that point chaos takes over.

How do you see the relationship between your own wants/desires and your peace of mind? Does your equanimity depend on the circumstances of your life, or the focus of your heart?

"No" Is A Complete Sentence

2009-06-25T00:01:00.001-05:00

Barbara is a friend who is always willing to lend a helping hand. She will drop what she is doing to assist her neighbor by taking her to the grocery store. If the elderly woman down the block needs a ride to the doctor, all she has to do is call Barbara. Barbara will also spend hours on the phone listening to her younger sister's endless problems, or her mother's countless aches and pains. She is just the sweetest, most kind and sensitive person you would ever want to meet.

There is only one small difficulty. Because she is so engaged with the concerns of others, she has no time for her own husband and children. Their needs and concerns somehow never make it into Barbara's line of vision. Consequently there is friction and discord in her household. When she is criticized or asked about this, she simply replies that she "can't say no to others who are depending on her." Her family should "not be so selfish. They should be more understanding."

Barbara is struggling with a problem that is not that uncommon: Boundaries. The ability and freedom to set boundaries in one's life is critical to survival. The insight to know one's limitations, and the strength to live within them enables one to give of oneself in a healthy and life-giving way -- healthy and life-giving not only for oneself, but also for others.

I was helped to learn this lesson early on in my life as a young priest. I was counselled by an older priest who told me: "NO is a complete sentence." What he showed me was that it is OK, it is acceptable to say "No" to others without having to give reasons or excuses. I do not have to justify my answer to them, just give it to them. I do not need to feel guilty or ashamed for not meeting their needs. I do not have to feel inadequate for not satisfying their expectations. I do not have to feel like I have failed simply because I have set boundaries for myself that preserve my health and sanity. I do not have to live in fear of disappointing others, only in the freedom of loving them.

As another older priest once said to me: "The Savior has come. He is not YOU!" In other words, the world is not dependent on ME to solve all its problems. I have been called to fulfill a task, a mission, but it is not to SAVE the world. So the setting of boundaries on my part is not going to lead to the downfall of the world. Only to the survival of my own world.

Where do you have a hard time setting boundaries or saying "No" to others? What would you like to do about that today?

Values Guide Choices

2009-06-23T00:01:00.002-05:00

Movement is a sign of life, even when the direction is not clear. We are certainly alive in our Morning Bible Study because there is much movement going on.

Yesterday morning, John departed Montana for a four-day trek back to San Antonio, TX where he will be starting a new job. This will also provide him with the opportunity to spend more time with his three grandchildren before the military transfers them and their parents sometime this fall. Meanwhile, his wife, Clar, is staying behind for a couple of months in Montana before joining them.

Gail and Marilyn are entertaining their granddaughter, Therese, for a few weeks. At the same time, they are preparing for the influx of family for the celebration of their 50th Wedding Anniversary over the 4th of July. There is still time for any friends or family to add thoughts or reflections to my previous blog so that I can include them in the booklet I am preparing for the "newly weds".

My Love and I are juggling schedules with her sister, Annette, who is in the process of remodeling her home in Larrabee before moving back to it this coming weekend. That is all being done while at the same time trying to provide 24 hour care for their parents, especially her Dad. With the rest of the family, we are approaching decisions about their future care. Where all that will lead remains to be seen.

As all these decisions and new directions are entered into, it becomes more and more clear what the values are of those making them. What is truly important and what shapes meaning for all those involved begins to surface as the peripheral and unimportant is stripped away. Questions begin to surface like: Whose good are we focusing on? What do we really want for them? What is the best choice at this time? As was said on our call yesterday, "We may not be doing what we like to do, but we are doing what we want to do." We are doing what we really value in our heart of hearts.

Look back on the important decisions that you have made in the last months, last year. What do they tell you about your own values? What are you able to sift out for yourself and say with clarity: These are my values. Are you satisfied with them?

Birthday Greetings To A Special Lady

2009-06-20T00:01:00.001-05:00

This past Wednesday we celebrated the birthday of the World's Best Mother-in-law! What a joyful celebration it was with good friends, delicious food, and plenty of fun and games. Present with us for this special occasion was My Love's friend from Bolivia, Sr Suzanne, who is also a longtime friend of the family. Having her with us made the day even more special.
My Love had prepared her famous barbecue ribs. They are so good that when we came up here from Texas, the Tony Roma's ("We're Famous For Ribs") restaurant in Sioux City closed down. Along with the twice baked potatoes, veg salad, asparagus spears, it was terrific. Topped off with angel food cake and homemade ice cream. What a banquet!

For the afternoon, games of marbles were lined up and enjoyed by all. Then followed happy hour with wine and munchies. As you can see from the attached pictures, everyone enjoyed themselves.

Together with family members who called to give birthday greetings, we all thank God for the gift of life that we are so privileged to share in through Mother Rita. May God grant her many more years of health and happiness.

Old Age Is Not Kind

2009-06-18T00:01:00.003-05:00

While living in Texas, My Love and I worked for eight years in the nursing home business. She served as Admissions Coordinator/Marketing Director, and I as Administrator. It was a very rewarding and enjoyable, albeit stressful, occupation. We were blessed with the opportunity to minister to people at a very trying and transitional period of their lives. Helping residents to adjust to the curtailing of their lives in an institutional setting, and assisting family members in the very difficult decision to place a loved one in our care, these were the focal points of our day-to-day energies.

Through the years of that work, and even in conversations since, many people have said to us that there is no way that they could do that kind of work. It would be too depressing, too sad, too taxing for them to handle. Yet, in reality, it was very fulfilling. There were so many moments of humor -- like the day I was walking Raymond (a resident in the grip of Alzheimer's disease) into the dining room. Another resident, Marian, was observing us passing and said in a stage whisper, just loud enough for me to hear: "Sort of makes you wonder who is leading whom!" I thought I would die laughing.

There were also many holy, sacred moments when we were able to pray with people as they were dying. Or pray with their family members after they had died. Those were God-blessed times. It was truly a form of hospice as we helped people let go of life here and move into the fullness of life in God's own hands.

One of the things that we learned that helped us to deal with the people and their circumstances: there is a huge distinction between a person and their illness. Many times we were called upon to remind family members, who were upset by the behavior of their loved one, that this was not their father or their mother doing this. It was the illness manifesting itself in this way. That separation of person from disease made it a little easier to cope with what was unfolding before them.

I recall all those times now as we find ourselves reliving those experiences from the viewpoint of the care-givers. In supporting and taking care of family members here in Iowa who are now journeying on those same roads of senility and dementia, I find the pain and the pathos, the humor and the joys, the frustration and fears that we helped others navigate. I am finding the struggle to be very real, the emotions to be very strong, and the desire to make the best decisions for all concerned to be more clear than the decisions themselves.

Yet we walk in faith and love, knowing that God's plan will unfold as we continue in the process. The path will be revealed to us as we walk it step by step. Where it will lead, only God knows.

Which Wolf Are You Feeding?

2009-06-16T00:01:00.003-05:00

Perhaps you have seen the story being passed around on the Internet that goes something like this: A Native American father is speaking with his young son, telling him how there are within him two wolves who are fighting with each other. One is angry, vindictive, vicious and mean. The other is loving, patient, caring and peaceful. When the young son asks which one will prevail, the wise father replies: "Whichever one you feed."

As I was driving to work after lunch yesterday, there was a discussion on public radio. Those involved were pondering whether the recent rash of crimes against the Holocaust Museum, the abortion doctor killing in Kansas and other so-called "hate crimes" were being fueled by the inflammatory rhetoric of some far-right spokesmen and pundits. They were also considering whether the present historical situation with our economic crisis, a black president, the return of so many war-damaged veterans and the general insecurity of our age were feeding into this violent reaction within our society.

I don't have the definite answers to those particular questions. However, I am struck by the insight of the wise Native American referred to above. The same wisdom was expressed by St Paul in his letter to the Galatians: "Make no mistake about it, no one makes a fool of God! A man will reap only what he sows" (6:7). Those who focus on negativism, criticism, pessimism and cynicism can only bring forth a harvest that befits the seed they are watering. Their lives cannot bring forth the fruit of the Spirit listed in that same letter to the Galatians: "Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faith, mildness and chastity" (5:22-23).

As I tried to unravel in an earlier post, life is too short for me to expend my energies on things that produce only negative outcomes. Negative energy and negative thinking, which lead to negative actions, are not life-giving for me. They seem to be "feeding the wrong wolf", to pursue the imagery from above. Therefore, I refuse to read or pass on all those emails that tear down public personalities, whether they are political, religious, or social. I try to ask myself: "What of a positive nature does this add to our world? How is this going to help someone else live a better life?" When engaged in a conversation with someone else, and the direction turns negative and critical of another person, I try to change the focus or the topic to something more pleasant. Sometimes I am more successful than others.

Which wolf are you feeding in your day-to-day life? Which wolf do you want to take over your world? The world at large?

Self-Discipline

2009-06-13T00:01:00.001-05:00

This past week in our morning Bible Study, we have been considering the topic of "Self-discipline". For instance, one day we were studying Paul's words to Timothy in 2 Tim 1:7: "God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline." (Some translations have "self-control".) Out of our reflections and discussions, several things came to the fore.

First of all, self-discipline is a wonderful thing for other people to have. If THEY would just have more self-discipline, my life would be much easier. If other people would just control their tempers, if they would just control their desires, then the (my) world would be much more serene and peaceful.

Secondly, self-discipline is not a problem for me to have for a limited time. I can control my appetites or discipline my desires for a specified time period. For example, I can go on a diet for a month, or I can exercise for a couple of months with no problem. But to think about changing my lifestyle in such a way that I actually develop different habits and patterns of living for the rest of my life -- well, that is a different kettle of fish!

Another point that we came to is that self-discipline is much easier when it is something that I choose for myself, rather than something that is imposed upon me from outside. In other words, if I choose to limit my shopping habits and curtail my expenses because I want to be thrifty or saving and spend the money on charitable causes, that is much more palatable than having to curtail my shopping and my lifestyle because I have lost my job and have no source of income. In that latter case, I have no choice in the matter.

In the end, we decided that self-discipline is a fruit of the Spirit. As Paul says in Galatians: "The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience....and self-control" (5:22). As such, I do not attain it by simply gritting my teeth, stiffening my spine and plunging ahead. Rather, I need to learn to relax, surrender to the Spirit, and let God accomplish the work within me.

Fruits are not something that grow on a tree over night. They take time, patience and much cultivation. God will bring about the fruit of the Spirit called self-discipline/self-control in us as we accept the reality that we cannot do it ourselves, but we need to let God accomplish it in us. It is not my project, but the work of God in me. What a relief it is to know that! What a freedom to know that this is not one more thing that I HAVE TO DO!

Every Day is An Anniversary

2009-06-11T00:01:00.001-05:00

Last evening My Love and I took some time for ourselves to celebrate our wedding anniversary which was actually last Sunday. We went to one of our favorite restaurants in the area for a delightful meal of BBQ ribs and chicken, accompanied by a salad bar, baked or broasted potatoes and corn fritters. With a glass each of our chosen wine, it was a joyful celebration of our 13 years together.

At the same time, we came to the conclusion that it was not enough to celebrate just this once. After renewing our commitment to one another each day for the last 13 years, we decided that we must continue the festivities through 13 celebrations, however long that takes. After all, life is a gift, each day is a treasure, and so we want to experience it to the fullest with hearts open in gratitude.

God has blessed us abundantly during these past 13 years. At no time have we felt anything other than total immersion in God's love, even in the stressful or bleak moments. When we passed through the hurricane, we felt surrounded by God's constant care. As we moved back to Iowa, we found God's angels caring for us and going before us to prepare the way.

Now we rejoice in the love that God has given us for one another that grows with each passing day. As we enter into year 14, we do so with joy and anticipation of the coming wonders of God. Where we will be a year from now is known only in the mind of God. But we celebrate each day as it unfolds before us.

C Is For Control!

2009-06-09T00:01:00.003-05:00

My Love made it home safely -- but not until Saturday afternoon. She decided to take the opportunity, while traveling through eastern Iowa, to visit an elderly friend in Cedar Falls, and then a cousin in northern Iowa. Although her arrival was delayed, it was sweet nonetheless.

To celebrate our wedding anniversary on Sunday, we had some tentative plans to relax together, and then perhaps go out for an evening meal at a restaurant. However, around 11 am, we received a phone call from My Love's Mother saying that Dad needed a little extra attention and care since he was struggling with some confusion. So we went immediately and spent the day and evening with them, taking them for an outing, watching a movie and playing some games. It was a time of loving togetherness which turned out to be a blessing as we begin our 14th year of wedded bliss. Perhaps this is a foretaste of things to come.

Throughout the weekend, I found myself confronted again with my old nemesis: CONTROL. Time and time again in my life, through differing circumstances, God has brought me face to face with the primary issue in my spiritual journey -- Who is in charge here? While I frequently fool myself into believing that I hold the reins, never am I allowed to live with that misconception for any great length of time. God's loving hand on my shoulder gently taps, or sometimes lovingly slugs me to remind me of the truth: God is God, I am not! While at the time I do not always enjoy the call back to reality, in the end I am grateful that God does not let me wander too far from God's presence.

What is the primary spiritual issue that you have to deal with over and over again in your life? Do you see how God uses that to draw you closer into the Divine Presence? Do you accept it?

Absence Makes the Heart Grow

2009-06-05T00:01:00.004-05:00

Today My Love Comes Home!

For the last 10 days My Love has been traveling in eastern Iowa. She first visited my sister, Diane's home for four days to help in the preparation for the graduation of Diane's last daughter, Megan. Together they prepared potato salad, broccoli-cauliflower salad, watermelon-cantaloupe salad and lots of other delectables (like chicken lip dip) for the party that was held last Saturday evening.

Then My Love went to Cedar Rapids for a day to visit a friend. According to her report, they had a wonderful time reconnecting.

Her last stop these past four days has been to visit a family in Cascade, Iowa, that has been like a second family to her for many years. She discovered that the father of the family had just died several hours before her arrival. So she has spent these days helping the family prepare for and celebrate the funeral.

Now today My Love is coming home. This coming Sunday will be our 13th Wedding Anniversary. Believe it or not, this past week and a half is the first time that we have been apart for more than one night since we have been married. Hence my excitement on her return. While we have spoken with each other at least once each day, and most days twice, there is nothing like "love with skin on"!

Truly our anniversary will be a celebration: of love and gratitude.

Isaiah John

2009-06-02T00:01:00.001-05:00

Our friends, John and Clar, are the new, happy grandparents of Isaiah John, born just a couple of weeks ago. A healthy and bubbly boy, he gave his mother fits for the last couple of months, but arrived to the warm welcome of his parents, John and Clar's daughter, Trenna and her husband, Moyad. Also on the welcome committee were Isaiah's two older sisters, Makya and Ashtyn. He is truly finding a loving home in which to grow.

After spending the last six months in San Antonio, John and Clar are now heading back to their home in Montana. They travel to Texas for the winter, not just to avoid the Montana cold, but especially to spend time with these three precious grand babies. To have experienced the wonder of Isaiah John's entry into the world has been an added gift of this beautiful time spent with their offspring.

We have had the "pleasure from afar" of being a part of their experience. John and Clar are also part of our Morning Bible Study. Thus we have prayed and shared with them the joy of welcoming Isaiah John (named after his granddaddy!) into life.

Now we are praying them safely home to St Ignatius, Montana, where they will again be surrounded by the beauty of the mountains. May God go with them as they journey with a large part of their hearts left behind in San Antonio. And may Isaiah John and his two sisters continue to know the boundless love of their grandparents.

People Connect

2009-05-30T00:01:00.001-05:00

Recently I connected once again with a high school classmate with whom I had lost contact for many years. We grew up near one another, went all through grade and high school together, and then went our separate ways. It was good to compare notes, see how our lives had changed, and how they had remained the same over the years.

I find that as I move into my "senior years", I want to re-establish relationships with people from my past life. This is especially true of people who played some kind of significant role in my life at a former stage. It's as though there is "unfinished business" that requires completion, as though the circle must be fully drawn.

This in turn brings me back to the realization, which I've reflected on in a previous pondering, that all we really have in life are the relationships we've formed. Since, as the saying goes, "There are no uhauls behind the hearse", we can take nothing out of this life except the people we carry in our hearts.

So what more important thing are you doing today than building, patching up and strengthening the connections with the people in your life?

Blessed Are They

2009-05-28T00:01:00.001-05:00

Blessed are those who have nothing to say, and don't take all day to do it! This is one of those wise sayings that is ignored at one's own peril. So today, only a few ramblings.

We have been enjoying fresh lettuce, spinach, radishes and onions from our garden. How delicious! How much we have missed while in Texas. Makes coming back to Iowa all the more worthwhile.

Finally last evening, we finished hanging the four new fans in the condo of My Love's parents. Their children had gifted them with four new ceiling fans, one for each bedroom, one for the dining area, and another for the living room. Each fan includes a light kit, so now they have ceiling lights in all the rooms. Thanks to the help of a local guy, we have them in place and the Folks are very pleased and happy.

This weekend we will celebrate the graduation of my sister's youngest daughter, Megan. It will be another wonderful opportunity to join together with family in an event that we would have missed in Texas. The blessings of God continue to unfold.

So now it is time to finish and heed the words of the Wise Man quoted above.

Father Hank and Marriage

2009-05-26T00:01:00.002-05:00

Gail and Marilyn, celebrating 50 years of wedded bliss, have requested to recognize and honor someone who had a great impact on the success of their marriage. I am welcoming them as Guest Authors of this blog today.

* * * * * * *

I REMEMBER

Father Hank Schorn

November 9, 1930-April 22,1981Father Hank, 28 years have passed since you have died and joined Our Father God. This year 2009 we are celebrating 50 years of COMMITMENT to marriage. Our hearts in 2009 are still deeply etched with your own words: "You two must be the greatest sign of Matrimony that this world has ever known. If you don't LIVE your sacrament, the world will never know how GREAT coupleness can be." You, Hank, always pushed and pushed us to be GREAT...to be EXCELLENT.

Only History will judge to what degree we have lived or are living that passionate plea.

We still remember you, Father Hank, at the Eucharist- not because we pray for you or ask you to pray for us but because to us your LIFE with us and for us was and is Eucharist. You made Eucharist such a deeply heartfelt celebration. We remember you affirming and loving us as your arms embraced us-bringing us PEACE and strength and moments of conversion. We remember you as a caring person to each person you came in contact with. Status or politics didn't impress you.......

I remember your playfulness and chiding with Father Printy and the resulting deep giggles of laughter that didn't stop.
I remember you celebrating your last birthday with Father Pauly Fangman beside you. I have that picture on my Memory Board and see you every day.

You judged people by the qualities of their heart.

We miss your physical presence....however the GIFT of your passionate vision of what Matrimony can be still burns in our hearts. The Impossible Dream seems possible when you say it......

I INVITE EACH OF YOU TO REMEMBER FATHER HANK AND SHARE WITH US. HOW ABOUT A FATHER HANK.....STAND UP FOR MARRIAGE DAY CELEBRATION SOME TIME DURING THE YEAR OF 2009. EACH OF YOU CELEBRATE THE GIFT OF YOU......HE WILL COME AND ENJOY THE DAY............Gail and Marilyn Koch

The Shack

2009-05-23T00:01:00.003-05:00

When I read The Shack by William P Young a few months back, I was touched by the insight into the personal view of God which this author expressed. Definitely outside the usual images and concepts that we associate with the Divine, this book expresses a reality that I found both challenging and comforting. The author has captured a very personal and relational vision of the inner workings of the Godhead, while also picturing that same intimacy as available to us.

This book has at the same time caused quite a stir and fury among some believers who consider it blasphemy, heresy and unbiblical. They tend to harangue about this book with a ferocity that certainly calls into question their real fears and motives. What is it that really bothers them? Why is it that they feel a need to attack?

I have found that this group of people is made up of individuals who have a rather rigid and narrow concept of God. Somehow God is defined by their language, their concepts, their images, ideas and theology. Anything that varies from that paradigm somehow is not true, but even seen as evil.

Yet as I read the Bible, I am struck by verses such as Is 55:8-9: "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways says the Lord. As high as the heavens are above the earth, so high are my ways above your ways and my thoughts above your thoughts."

God is not confined to our limited understanding, nor hemmed in by our narrow vision. I don't care which religion or faith we profess, whether Christian, Buddhist, Jewish or Muslim, as soon as we think that we have a corner on and control of the Divine, we have set ourselves outside the Reality. Whether Catholic, Lutheran, Baptist or Evangelical -- or any other denomination -- our finite grasp of the Infinite is more unlike the Truth than it is like it. We have more inaccuracies in our personal view than certainties. God is totally Other. When we think that we have solved the Mystery, we are just plain wrong.

In the Old Testament, the Lord said: "I am the Lord your God...You shall have no other gods before me" (Exodus 20:2-3). Yet the Israelite people were constantly being warned and punished for making images of God which they would then worship. These were in the form of a golden calf or one of the other neighboring gods. Continually God called them to abandon this limited image of God.

In our own lives, God from time to time also calls us to let go of our encrusted image of the Divine and expand, stretch our understanding. Maybe we are not making actual physical idols. However, sometimes the idol has become our own understanding of Who God is and how God works. God then challenges us to grow, to move beyond that idol.

So when I find people defending God against supposed attacks, I am led to think that they are rather defending their understanding of God. It is their own insecurity many times that pushes them to this offensive posture. Their own fear drives them to tear down what they find to be threatening.

Somehow, I believe that God is able to take care of the Divine Godhead. It is I who need to change.

So if you are looking for a book that will stir you up, give this one a try.

Spring Lake

2009-05-21T00:01:00.000-05:00

For the last two evenings, My Love and I have walked around the small lake on the south end of Cherokee. (Of course, I did not think to bring a camera along!) Called Spring Lake, it is a gravel pit that has been transformed into a wonderful park with shelter houses, picnic tables, grills, playground equipment for children, camping facilities for motor homes and travel trailers, several fishing spots, and a paved walking trail around the outside that takes about 1/2 hour to complete.

Swimming on the water were Canada geese with their little goslings in tow, mallard ducks with several small ducklings following, and many and varied species of birds flitting through the trees as they serenaded us with their sweet melodies.

Set off by the flowering lilac bushes, honeysuckle, bridle wreath and other blossoming trees, it is a true piece of paradise. Immersing ourselves in this reawakening of creation, it is impossible to be sad, worried, depressed or anxious. The surrounding beauty is almost intoxicating with the glory of God.

Even such a short half-hour stroll sends my heart bursting forth in praise and thanksgiving to God who encircles me every day with such reminders of the Eternal Presence. From time to time, I need these obvious taps on the shoulder to bring me again to consciousness of what is always there. Thank you, God.

Big Fish, Little Fish

2009-05-19T00:01:00.002-05:00

Last Saturday, My Love and I took her parents to the graduation of their LAST of 34 grandchildren. Their son Don's youngest, Luke, graduated with high honors from Elk Point-Jefferson High School, near Sioux City. We were all proud when Luke delivered a very impressive speech as the representative man of the class.

In addition to Luke's excellent discourse, I was struck by two other things during the graduation. First of all, of the 54 students in the graduating class, all but one were going on to some form of higher education, be it college, community college or trade school. It spoke very loudly to me of the high value and emphasis that their families and educators have instilled in them over the years.

Secondly, I was impressed by the fact that a large percentage of the graduates were entering fields related to science. There were future biology majors, pre-dentistry, nurses, physical therapists, veterinary medicine and dietetics. This fact told me that there must be a very strong science department in that school.

I began to wonder: Is it better to be a big fish in a little pond? Or a small fish in a big pond? For years I have pondered this. I have met many people who have risen to the "top of their heap" however small the heap may have been. They have found and developed their talents and specialties until they have excelled to the point of standing out from the crowd. They may be the best in their field of endeavor.

But I always have the question: How much of their ability has really been realized? As we become more proficient in any given area, it seems to always be at the expense of developing other areas of our life. Our field of focus tends to get narrower. I've heard it said of specialists: "They learn more and more about less and less, until finally they know everything about nothing."

Is it not better to be a broadly developed person, knowledgeable in many areas? A well-rounded person certainly fits in much better in more varied situations. A person who is comfortable with different kinds of folks with varying educational and developmental levels is certainly more pleasant to be around, to work with, to share life with.

For me, the answer is not simple. We only have one life to live. We can only choose one path which may then branch off in various directions. It is possible to make changes, adjustments to our course, but only to a limited degree.

When I see young people, like Luke and his classmates, I think that they have their whole life ahead of them. What an exciting reality filled with infinite possibilities! I only pray that they will make the right choices that will bring them the fullness of life that God has in store for each of us.

Hindsight Now

2009-05-16T00:01:00.002-05:00

Yesterday on our morning Bible sharing, Gail was telling how painful and depressing it was to go through a bankruptcy back in the 1980s. In that experience, he lost his business, and their family lost their home. Then, he went on to make the statement: "It was the best thing that ever happened to us."

That set me thinking! How often don't we look back at a terrible situation and see the good that has come out of it. How many times in our lives have we not experienced a loss, illness, death or business setback only to come out of it realizing the blessing that has come into our lives. How often have we not been stretched, pummeled and reshaped by circumstances that we never would have chosen, but that life presented to us. As we look back, we see the Hand of God at work. We know the truth of Paul's words in Romans: "Everything works together for good for those who love God" (8:28).

"Faith is hindsight brought into the present" said a preacher one time. If we can look back on an unpleasant situation and see God at work, realizing the good that has come out of it, why can't we, in faith, see that Same Hand in this moment moving in the unwelcome circumstances of life? Or do we not believe that in the future we will be able to look back on this moment and see the growth that it brought about? Do we not trust that God is able to handle this struggle just as well as He handled the last one?

Faith truly changes our perspective on reality. It sets our feet on firm soil, or perhaps on a mountaintop, from which we can see our small piece of the puzzle in the broader scheme of things. From that vantage point we are able to breathe in the fresh air of freedom since we are able to let go of our self-pity, our pain and our misery. What peace comes with that! After all, "if God is for us, who can be against us" (Romans 8:31).

Where is Home?

2009-05-14T00:01:00.003-05:00

It was nearly three years ago when My Love flew out to California to bring her cousin, Catherine, to live in South Texas. At 94 years of age, her son had died and she was desiring to be closer to family members. Her remaining son lived in Texas.

As we settled her into the apartment we had arranged for her in a residential care facility, she said: "Thank you. It is very nice, but it will never be home." I felt sad for her as I did not understand what she was saying.

Last year, we lost our home in the hurricane and have moved back to our family roots in Iowa. After living in the small apartment that we have rented for the past 10 months, I now have a better grasp of what Catherine was saying. While our place is very comfortable and quite adequate for our needs, it will never be home. In fact, My Love and I have come to the conclusion, and peacefully so, that we will never have another home. Never again will we live in a place in which we invest so much time, energy and emotion.

When we purchased our home 12 1/2 years ago, neither of us had ever had our own home. We had always lived our lives to that point in someone else's dwelling. Having our own place in which we could invest our hearts, our funds, our time and our energies was a key priority for us. We did that. We made our South Texas ranchito into the small corner of paradise that fulfilled that desire for both of us. And we enjoyed it for 12 years.

Now that it is history for us, we appreciate it for the gift that it was. We also recognize it as past as we have come to see the truth expressed in our faith, that we are only pilgrims on this earth. Our true home is not here, so why should we be like the apostles on the Mountain of Transfiguration and want to build "three tents" and stay here forever! (Mt 17:4)

As My Love is wont to say: "Home is a Love you can count on." That is wherever we are, for it is the love of one another which reflects the Love of God drawing us to our true home.

Glorious Spring!

2009-05-12T00:01:00.002-05:00

How wonderful is Spring! If I were a poet, I would certainly spin out mellifluous lines about the beauty around me for there is no end to it. But, woe is me, I'm a prose man, and so you are stuck with reading a prosaic observation rather than a poetic one

Last Saturday, I spent the afternoon in the garden with My Love. It is so exciting. We had not been out there since the previous Monday because of the many rain showers throughout the week. What a pleasant surprise! The leaf and head lettuce were standing proudly in their rows. Beans, peas and kohlrabi were stretching up to take advantage of the bright sunshine. Spinach and cilantro added a deeper green to the pattern. Even the onions and corn were far enough out of the ground to be able to distinguish the rows. The only plants not yet up are those that we just planted a week ago.

We spent the time laying down black material between the rows to prevent the weeds/grass from taking over, while still allowing the rain to soak into the ground. According to the plan, this will save us a lot of time over the coming months by eliminating some of the weeding.

At home, we are enjoying orioles, goldfinches and wrens perching on the feeders that the neighbor downstairs has out. They have to fight with the purple finches, as well as the sparrows who want their turn. Of course the robins and black birds are busy searching the lawns for some tasty morsels. Every now and then, a blue jay gets into the fracas to add a note of disharmony.

The flowering trees and shrubs are more full and colorful this year than I can remember. It seems to me that there are so many more of them around than when we lived up here before. Flowering crabs, lilac, Eastern redbuds and many other types are bursting with bright hues and delightful fragrances. It's a pleasure just to drive down the road and experience the collage of colors.

Perhaps we are appreciating this explosion of Springtime more because we have missed it for the past twelve years while living in Texas. The coming of this season in South Texas, while welcome, was definitely less of a contrast with winter than here in Iowa. We are grateful to God for this opportunity to bask in His beauty.

Witness to Love

2009-05-09T00:01:00.006-05:00

Our friends, Gail and Marilyn, whom I've written about in a former blog, will soon be rejoicing as they celebrate their 50th Wedding Anniversary. May 18th is the actual date, however they are planning a family gathering to share their gratitude to God with a week of festivities in July in Idaho, where they reside. They are opening their home and their hearts so that others can join them in thanking God, but also so that they can express their gratitude to their friends and family for supporting them with love, encouragement, prayers and faith throughout the years. Without that, they realize that they would never have made it to this historic moment.

My Love and I have been blessed to know Gail and Marilyn these last five years. We met them through Reliv, but it was only a short time before our connections to them broadened into a believing and supportive faith community. Through their instrumentality, we were invited into, and joined a Leadership Bible study with another couple, Greg and Teri. That group has now expanded to include a fourth couple, John and Clar. For nearly four years now, we have joined together by phone on a conference call each Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday morning for one half hour of Scripture sharing. What a gift and blessing this has been in our life, My Love and me.

Through this Bible study, I have come to appreciate the deep faith that Gail and Marilyn have shared over the many years of their life together. In trials and tribulations, joys and sorrows, ups and downs, they have ultimately found their strength and direction in their coupled faith lives and the support of the believing community. They are a true witness to the faithfulness and love of God who "works all things together for good" (Romans 8:28). Gail and Marilyn's support and prayers were especially key in our lives during the hurricane last year and the ensuing uprooting and moving to Iowa. We are very grateful to them and for them.

In tribute to their love and faithfulness to one another and to God who has blessed them, I am dedicating this blog to them. May those of you who read it find edification and encouragement through their witness. May you also be led to reflect on the way Gail and Marilyn have touched your life.

I invite those of you who know them, family, friends, neighbors, business associates, to go to the comment section of this blog (directions are in the left column) and add your own comments and reflections on Gail and Marilyn's impact in your life. Please also invite others to add their thoughts by referring them to this blog. As the time for the July celebration draws near, I will compile all the many (hopefully) comments for presentation to them.

"I am sure of this, that He who has begun this good work in you (Gail and Marilyn), will carry it through to completion right up to the day of Christ Jesus" (Philippians 1:6).

Then Came the Angels

2009-05-07T00:01:00.002-05:00

Part 2 of the story (at Marilyn's request) of the hurricane/flood that brought us to Iowa. For Part 1 see And the Waters Came.

Although a deep peace settled in our hearts with the decision to uproot our lives and move back to our home area in Iowa, we were faced with the reality of dealing with a home and property buried under several feet of filthy water. From the very beginning God sent hovering angels to assist, encourage and uplift us.

First there was our neighbor, Beno, across the road. When Janella stopped there to ask if she could park our car in front of their house because we could not drive in and out of our property, he not only agreed, but went on to say that he had an empty apartment available right there where we could stay. This would also provide us with a handy location to store any of our things as we moved them out of the inundated house. The apartment even had a refrigerator/freezer included.

We began late Thursday afternoon floating things out to the road in three large, plastic garbage cans that we had in our garage. We started with all our food items from our refrigerator and freezer. After floating them out to the road, we loaded them onto our pickup, which we had fortunately driven out of the yard before the water made that impossible. Then, we drove across the road where we unloaded into the apartment. This was to be our pattern, with some adaptations for the next two days.

On one of these journeys late Thursday, as we were attempting to lift the garbage cans onto the pickup, another pickup stopped behind us. Three big, burly guys got out, came over, and asked if there was anything they could do to help. They were oil rig workers who were on their way to check on a well nearby. (So they said! We know they were really angels!) We told them that we would really appreciate their assistance in hauling a mattress from one of our beds to the apartment across the street so that we would have a place to sleep that night. They proceeded to follow us up to the house where we showed them one of the mattresses that was not yet soaked. They picked it up with no problem and delivered to our temporary haven.

The next morning we called our friends, Chuck and Lou, to ask if they could come with their sons, Jose and Dan, to help us. They became our archangels. They arrived with a friend of theirs and began organizing the move of all our salvageable belongings. They stayed with us throughout Friday and Saturday as they oversaw the transfer of our life from one side of the road to the other. At one point, Chuck commented to me: "You know, everything you move out of here, you will have to move back in." My response was: "Not if we don't move back in."

Throughout Friday, many people (angels) stopped along the road and asked if they could help. At one point we had 12 people assisting us, most of whom we did not know. One man who was helping, asked us, in Spanish, if it would help if he went home and got his small fishing boat. Then we could load things on the boat and pull it out to the trucks that we were loading on the road. He brought the boat, and we used it until Sunday. By Saturday evening, we had everything worth salvaging out of the house and across the street in the apartment.

It was late Friday afternoon when Lou invited us to stay with them in their home as long as necessary. It was like a light in the darkness because I don't know how we would have been able to survive if we had stayed in the small apartment, faced with the piles of our stuff that had been placed all over. We accepted their hospitality, which allowed us not only to enjoy the comfort of their home and a bit of normalcy, but also to share faith as we moved through this experience.

The following week was spent going through things in the apartment, deciding what we wanted to keep and take with us, and what we wanted to let go of. We planned and held a yard sale the following Friday and Saturday, right out in front of the apartment on the main highway that passed by. During that yard sale, we were assisted by two more angels, Judy and Phil, our friends.

Meanwhile, My Love had talked with her sister, Annette, in Iowa and asked her to look for a place for us to rent. She was another angel as she spent several days running around, talking with realtors, and scouring ads. But she was also a successful angel for she found the wonderful two-bedroom apartment that we are now renting, at a very reasonable and affordable price.

At the same time that all the packing and sorting was being done, we were busy deciding what to do with our home and property. We met with two friends who were involved in real estate, investments and financial planning. One of them, Rudy, had just been brought into our lives about six months before. He turned out to be another angel. He knew someone, Algis, who was a contractor who was looking for a property like ours. On the following Sunday, we met with Algis and his expectant wife, Daniela, in our water-soaked house. She immediately fell in love with the home. He fell in love with my shop. So, through Rudy, an arrangement was reached whereby Algis would fix up the house and move into it. With this arrangement, we were able to leave with a peaceful and joyful heart knowing that someone else would be enjoying our home as much as we did.

With that taken care of, we then proceeded to rent a U-haul truck which we loaded with all the remaining articles of our life together. Finally, on Wednesday afternoon, August 6, we began our trek north with our little caravan of truck pulling a car carrier followed by My Love in our car. On the car carrier was our pickup filled with stuff, as was the car following. We proceeded as far as Denton, TX, that night where we slept for a few hours. Rising early, we journeyed on, arriving in Cherokee, Iowa Thursday evening about 8:30 pm.

Friday we spent looking at the new apartment, and getting ready to move in. On Saturday, another flock of angels arrived to help unload the truck and move our furniture and other things into the house. The 10 or so relatives and friends did not have an easy task of it, for our apartment is up a flight of 23 stairs on the second floor. Yet they were real troopers and got the job accomplished that day.

The final touch of God's love came through several angels who sent us gifts of money to help with our expenses of moving. When we totalled it all up, it covered exactly the expense of the u-haul rental, the gas driving up, the cost of the motel and the meals on the way. Is God wonderful, or what?

As I reflect back over this experience, I am overwhelmed at the over-arching love, care and providential direction of God which was so present through the people put in our path. Never for a moment were we allowed to forget Who was behind and throughout this movement. Never could we fail to remember the existence of angels who come when we need them.

And the Waters Came

2009-05-05T00:01:00.004-05:00

On our morning Bible study call yesterday, Marilyn asked if I had ever shared on my blog the story of the hurricane/flood that brought us to Iowa. Since I have only referred to it briefly in several writings, she encouraged me to "tell the whole story". So, here goes!

When My Love and I moved to South Texas in 1996, we went house hunting with a realtor. After viewing about a dozen different places, we found exactly what we desired. It was a brick ranch style home with eight acres surrounding and lots of large trees, including many fruit trees. This was our ranchito and we settled in very quickly and comfortably.

Over the ensuing years, we slowly made it our own, adding an outdoor jacuzzi in 2000, a shop/garage in 2001, dogs and cats, and planting additional trees and desert plants. Our adaptations culminated in the summer of 2006 with a major remodeling project in which we totally gutted the interior, added an attached garage, put on a new metal roof, new windows, and extended the kitchen and office. Now it was everything that we wanted and desired it to be.

We enjoyed this small piece of paradise for two years. Then in July 2008, our lives took a sharp turn. On July 23, Hurricane Dolly struck the Texas Gulf Coast, coming ashore about 40 miles from us. During the night, the winds and rain pounded our area and the water began to rise. Unbeknown to us there was a break in an irrigation canal about 1/4 of a mile from our home. At 7:00 am on July 24, the water began to seep in around the foundation of our house. We started to put furniture up on blocks, on tables, desks and beds. The first thing to succumb to the water was our laminate wood flooring which we had installed throughout the home, which buckled up and floated away. By 1:30 pm, we accepted the reality that there was nothing we could do to save our house. The dirty water was now more than 12 inches deep throughout the whole structure and would remain so for more than a week.

In the moment that we accepted the actuality of the situation, My Love and I turned to each other and said: "It's time to go home to Iowa." We did not know how that would happen, but we knew in our hearts that that was where we belonged. God had closed the door on South Texas, but He had opened a window and we floated out. We were totally at peace with our situation, and with the decision that came with it.

Next: How that New Reality unfolded.

African Time

2009-05-02T00:01:00.004-05:00

While walking down the street in an African village, I soon discovered the necessity of taking time to visit with the people I would meet. No matter what each person's destination or the purpose of their travels, the most important thing at this moment for them was to stop, inquire into my welfare (at length), and make me feel both welcome and important. Schedules, appointments, business -- all gave way to the pre-eminence of the person standing before them.

I was deeply impressed with the value their culture places on the person. The person is more important than the task at hand; the person is more important than making money; the person is more important than some schedule. This was true not just for me as a visitor, but also for one another in their world.

Therefore, time became a very fluid commodity. We would joke about African time and say "It is 7 o'clock until it is 8 o'clock," because if someone was scheduled for a meeting at 7, they might not arrive until 8. For those of us from a western culture with the emphasis on punctuality, it took some adjustment, and sometimes a lot of patience. I found this same focus on the importance of the individual to the denigration of time in the Hispanic culture, both in Bolivia and in South Texas.

Yet, as I read the story of Jesus in the Gospels, it seems that he was anything but pressured by deadlines or hemmed in by time constraints. He always had time, took time, made time for the needs of the person in front of him -- the blind, the crippled, the infirmed, the hungry. Definitely people were his priority as he went about doing the will of his Father.

If I look at the way my time is spent, what does it tell me about my priorities? Are people more important than anything else? Do I spend time with the people who are the most significant in my life? Or are work, schedules, deadlines controlling me? Is this the way that I want it to be?

Planting the Future

2009-04-30T00:01:00.003-05:00

Tuesday evening I was gifted with more than an hour with My Love helping her plant more "goodies" in her garden. Together we put in potatoes and onion sets (red, white and yellow). Yes, I know, the potatoes were supposed to be put in on Good Friday, but they only arrived this week from the seed company. Apparently, due to the economic slump, there are so many people planting their own food this year that the seed companies cannot keep up. Isn't that a wonderful thing! Think of all the quality time that people are taking to get back to the basics of life.

I couldn't help but think of my Dad, who always had a garden. When he would come home from work at the end of the day, he would go out to pull a few weeds, or water, or pick some vegetables. It was his time alone, time for peace and quiet before coming into the house to deal with us children. Somehow we knew enough not to disturb him during these precious few moments alone.

Anyway, instead of Good Friday, we celebrated Great Tuesday. It was a great feeling to get my hands into the soil and experience the hope and anticipation of the harvest as we placed each small onion and potato. In Texas, we tried one year to have a garden, but the heat was too intense. We needed to water the plants early in the morning before going to work, and then again after we came home in the evening. Then we only harvested some scrawny little vegetables. It wasn't worth it, especially when we could go 1/4 mile down the road any day of the week and buy fresh fruits and vegetables off the back of a truck.

As we were finishing our task Tuesday evening, a few drops of rain began to fall. Throughout the night and yesterday all day, we continued to receive on-again off-again light showers. It was truly God blessing our efforts! I am reminded of Paul's words in 1 Cor 3:7: "Neither he who plants nor he who waters is of any special account, only God who gives the growth."

Isn't that the way it is with everything in life? We are planting seeds, or watering what others have planted. Maybe we are even harvesting what others have labored over. But all of it is a gift from God who has given it to us.

What are you doing today? planting? or watering? or harvesting? Do it with a grateful heart.

O Great Ones

2009-04-28T00:01:00.007-05:00

On several trips to Africa in the 1970s and 80s, I came to understand and appreciate how the people of Tanzania honored and revered the elderly in their society. When a man reached an age that we would call Senior Citizen, he would be given an honorary title of "Mse" (pronounced "Umzay"). This is a title which cannot readily be translated into English in one word, for it means something like "O Great One", or "O Most Honored One", or "O Wise One". It is truly a title of distinction and reverence.

Perhaps this was so noticeable to me because it is something which has disintegrated in our own culture and society. With our cult of youth, we view the elderly in our midst as a burden, if not a down right disposable commodity. My eight years experience working as a nursing home administrator underscored this reality only too clearly. Many people were delivered to the care of our facility only to then be forgotten by their families. It was sad.

For this reason, it is such a gift for My Love and me to be back here in Iowa where we can be close to our parents. We have the opportunity to be in contact with them on a regular basis and to be of assistance to them when they need it.

In fact, I am so very proud of My Love and the care that she is providing for her parents. Not a day goes by that she isn't in touch with them. Most days she spends several hours with them, cleaning for them, shopping for groceries, taking them to doctor's appointments, taking them on outings, playing games with them. Some days she is with them all day doing whatever needs to be done to make it possible for them to stay in their own home comfortably.

She would say that this is no big deal, that it is a gift for her to be able to be for them at this time in their life after all they have done for her in previous years. But that is just the point: it is a big deal because it is not being done today in our society by younger generations. Most of our society would be more in tune with the Eskimo tradition of putting the elderly on an ice floe and letting them float away until they are frozen to death or eaten by polar bears.

Yet, here we are because of God's hand and direction in bringing us back home. Each day gives us more reason for gratitude. As I've said in an earlier blog, it's all about family!

A Special Picnic

2009-04-25T00:01:00.003-05:00

On Thursday temperatures climbed into the upper 80s -- a record-setting day. Even though it was a bit windy, My Love decided that it was time for the first picnic of the year. So, she packed up the hamburgers, hot dogs, cookies, drinks, charcoal, lighter fluid, and her parents and headed down to Spring Lake.

While she was preparing the fire for the grilling, her folks went down by the lake to sit on a bench where they could watch the geese. Two were nesting nearby, keeping a wary eye on them lest they present some sort of threat to the eggs, which the setting goose faithfully turned from time to time. Other geese, and even a pair of mallards, skimmed across the water, honking and splashing as they took off or landed in the beautiful sunshine.

I joined them for lunch and enjoyed the refreshing outdoors with its brisk breeze, leaves beginning to pop out, and the wonder of the birds singing. After the long winter, it was easy to appreciate the beauty of spring once again.

I was reminded of the difference I had discovered many years ago when I went to Africa for the first time. There I saw people who had small, simple shacks that they called home. Yet, as I observed them, I realized that they lived outside, and sometimes they went inside. That is, they cooked outside, they worked outside, they visited people outdoors, they shopped in the outdoor market. Then, at night they might go inside to sleep.

We, on the other hand, live inside, and sometimes we go outside. Most of our life's activities are accomplished inside the walls of our home, our office, our church, etc., and we only go outside to go from one inside to another. Maybe that is why it is such a treat to enjoy a picnic, or go camping for the weekend, or spend a day fishing at the lake. There seems to be a hunger within us to get outside, plant our feet once again on real soil and come in contact with our roots.

Yet, on a spiritual level, the opposite seems to be the case. When it comes to our own person, we prefer to live outside while ignoring our inner hungers. We busy ourselves with all sorts of activities and noises so that we cannot hear the still, small voice within. We distract ourselves with activity in order to not notice the cravings in our heart.

Then, once in a while we venture inside ourselves, but that is not where we are primarily comfortable. It is only for a rare picnic that we take a trip to our inner sanctuary. But we prefer not to stay too long.

Where would you rather live?

Sunshine Over Me

2009-04-23T00:01:00.002-05:00

Yesterday was a beautiful day with bright sunshine, temperatures in the mid 70s, and only a light breeze. It was actually too nice a day to be inside working, which I was doing. In fact, I was thinking of having My Love write a note to excuse me from work so that I could go outside to play!

Then I began thinking (always a dangerous thing to do). Why is it that I (and it seems like most of the people around me) feel so much better on a pleasant day than on a gloomy, overcast one? Why is it that I have more energy and am so much more ready to get things done when the weather is so uplifting?

At that point, I recalled my travels to Germany in the 1970s and 80s. Often times the weather was rainy, overcast, dreary and cold. I remember thinking on more than one occasion that it is no wonder that European history is so replete with wars, conflicts, skirmishes and struggles. If I had to live in weather that was predominately depressing, I would probably be fighting with someone also.

From there, my musing moved to the question of who/what is really in control of my moods and emotions. Weather is one of the things in my life over which I have absolutely no control. No matter what I say or do, I will not make the sun come out on a cloudy day, or encourage the wind to cease blowing. Why am I wasting my energy on something so useless? Or more to the point, why am I giving something so unpredictable the power to control how I respond to everyday life around me? The only thing that I have control over is my own reactions, my own responses to the realities around me. That brought me back to my Dad's favorite prayer again, the Serenity Prayer.

The bottom line question for me therefore is: Who is the Lord of my life? If I say that Jesus is Lord, then something so "outside myself" as the weather should not be able to have such an effect upon my moods and feelings. I really cannot surrender control of my life to the Lord while portioning some of that control to the forces of nature. Besides, it is much more enjoyable being in a good mood every day!

Carry-ons Only

2009-04-21T00:01:00.002-05:00

Back in the 1980s, I traveled to India several times. It was my practice to pack one change of socks and underwear in my carry-on bag along with my shaving kit, passport and other essentials. The rest of my clothes and travel accoutrements would go in my checked luggage.

On one of those journeys, I arrived in Bombay (now known as Mumbai) only to be informed that the bag that I had checked did not arrive with me. Since I was catching a connecting flight in country, I could not await my luggage, but went on without it.

Arriving at my destination, I went to the marketplace and purchased another change of socks and underwear, and one more shirt. With this limited wardrobe, I traveled for three weeks very comfortably. Each evening I would wash out my shirt, underwear and socks, hang them up in my room, and by morning they would be dry. This routine continued throughout my entire trek.

Finally, on my way out of the country, I passed again through Mumbai, picked up my wayward bag and went home.

Because of this experience, I realized that I could travel a lot lighter than I had previously. Many of the items that I considered "necessities" were actually only added weight for the journey. Without them, I passed much more rapidly through customs, waited less time at my destinations, and arrived much more refreshed.

Secondly, I discovered that I did not need to be a slave to fashion. Not once in all my travels did anyone comment on my wardrobe and say: "Oh, you're wearing the same outfit as yesterday!" Even if they were thinking it, never did it become an obstacle.

Lastly, I learned the freedom that comes from not being focused on the material measures of my person. "Clothes do not the man make", as someone once said. I was free to place my energies on the point of my trip - to meet with and help other people.

In these times of economic stress, all these lessons have continued to serve me well. Voluntary simplicity brings great freedom to life. The truth of Jesus' words echoes loudly in my ears: "Look at the birds in the sky. They do not sow or reap...yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important than they?...See the lilies of the field. They do not work or spin, yet not even Solomon in all his glory was arrayed like one of these...Stop worrying then over questions like 'What are we to eat, or what are we to drink, or what are we to wear?'...Your heavenly Father knows all that you need." Matthew 7:26-34.

Traveling lightly with only a carry-on makes the journey of life much easier. Since we are only pilgrims passing through this world, why do we let ourselves become burdened down with excess baggage?

Bicycle Brakes

2009-04-18T00:01:00.004-05:00

I was ten years old when I got my first bicycle, a sleek red beauty that went faster than the wind (or so I thought at that time). My parents had allowed me to pick out the bike I wanted from Montgomery Wards, but they also required that I earn the money first to pay for it. It was a lesson that still serves me well today.

One of the first things that I did after I brought the red beauty home was to turn it upside down, take the back wheel off, and disassemble the brake system. I wanted to know how it worked. So the simplest method was to take it apart, then put it back together again. From that point on, I was able to service the bike whenever it needed it.

At each stage of my life, I see the same desire to understand the inner workings of whatever organization, system, business or association with which I became connected. In college I became part of the Student Council, not as an elected representative, but as the parliamentarian -- the one behind the scenes who guided and even helped to control the workings of the body.

Later on, as a pastor, I wanted/needed to be "on top of" what was going on in the parish. Whether through the Parish Council, the School Board, the Liturgy Committee or any other organization, I wanted to keep tabs on what was happening. This was probably as much a control issue for me as it was a desire to be helpful and serve the needs of the people.

When I moved into the role of nursing home administrator, it was key for me to understand the functioning of all departments within the institution. My job description assigned me, and the law held me responsible for the total welfare of the people left in my care. This was a 24-hour per day, 365 days per year ministry which was confirmed by my administrator's license hanging on the wall. I took it seriously.

As I grow older, I find myself less able to understand everything, and certainly unable to control all things. Slowly I am coming to accept the reality that there is only One who understands everything, the same One who controls all things. Even more humbling is the realization that were I to purchase a new bicycle today, I probably would not be able to take apart and put back together the brake system.

Common Sense

2009-04-16T00:01:00.002-05:00

In six-plus months of working in the car business, I have learned much about human nature. My previous life experience had revealed many aspects of the human species, but the automobile business underscored heretofore shaded dimensions of the psyche.

George (not his real name) came in to trade his 2003 pickup for a 2005 model. According to book values, we could offer him $11,200 for his trade in, while the vehicle he wanted was valued at $25,000. While trying to help him get financing for the deal, I discovered two problems: he still owed $14,500 on his trade in; and he had not been consistent in making the payments, thereby jeopardizing his credit rating. So, as a consequence, George was unable to purchase the vehicle he desired, and we were unable to complete a sale. It was a lose-lose situation.

Tim (again a fictitious name) borrowed money from his bank to purchase a new (for him) auto. Before the first payment was made, he brought the vehicle back and turned it in, without even having registered or licensed it. He said that he had bought it to impress his girlfriend, and she left him anyway. Therefore he did not need it anymore.

Why do I bring these incidents to this venue? Because both of them illustrate what I have known for many years, but am discovering over and over again: Common Sense is NOT Common!

It would seem to be common sense that you cannot fail to pay your bills on time and then expect to maintain a good credit rating. Common sense would dictate that you cannot continually pay more for things than they are worth while piling up debt upon debt as you charge, finance, charge and finance again and again. Common sense would tell us that we cannot run indefinitely from the consequences of our decisions and our actions; sooner or later they will catch up with us.

Yet, that is what we have done as individuals, as a nation, indeed as a world. Perhaps that is a simple explanation for why we are in the financial condition we are in.

If there is to be a silver lining to the economic cloud that hangs over us, perhaps it will be that we will once again begin to live within our means. This will happen only as we once again distinguish between our needs and our wants.

In my experience, common sense is not something that can be taught except in the University of Hard Knocks. As someone said: Wisdom comes from experience, and experience comes from making mistakes. May we extract the nugget of wisdom that is hidden in this mountain of mistakes around us. May we begin to face the whimsical side of our nature that makes decisions based on short term immediate gratification. May we instead see the long term consequences of our choices, gain some common sense, and grow in freedom.

Signs of New Life

2009-04-14T00:01:00.003-05:00

Trees and lilac bushes budding out. Robins, red-wing blackbirds, meadow larks and other songbirds singing. Grass beginning to turn green. Rabbits and squirrels chasing their prospective mates around the yard. My Love nurturing her garden seeds in small cups in our office window and waiting anxiously to get her hands in the dirt as she and her sister, Annette, plant their garden together.

All these signs of New Life we celebrated as we gathered on Easter to rejoice in the Resurrection of Jesus. Besides the Risen Life held out to us, we also thanked God for the gift of life of Annette's husband, Jim, who had a birthday on Saturday. In between the delicious food, the marble games, the naps and the laughter, My Love and I reveled again in the blessing of renewing family traditions.

Together with her mother, My Love had enjoyed coloring eggs last week, making up baskets for various neighbors, friends and family members. This tradition was revived from our days together in Texas when the two of them would play together in the kitchen preparing for the Easter feast, something which they again did on Friday and Saturday.

It was even enjoyable to witness the disappointment on niece Rita's face as she came into the home of her Grandparents on Sunday morning to realize that the Easter eggs were not hidden, but out in plain sight. As a college graduate-to-be (next month), she still looked forward to the family tradition of hiding, searching for, and finding the eggs!

All these small celebrations of life and family traditions are nothing as compared to the New Life that this Easter season presents to us in Jesus. Each of these small "resurrections" is but a reminder of the Resurrection of Jesus that is ours to participate in each day as we choose life over death, hope over despair, love over resentment. Truly, He is Risen. So are we!

Easter Greetings

2009-04-11T00:01:00.008-05:00

How wonderful it is to be here in Iowa to celebrate Easter with our families! It is a true experience of the Alleluia that fills our lives because of Jesus' Resurrection.

A year ago we were happily rejoicing on this feast in our home in Edinburg, Texas. Friends (Denny and Linda) and relatives (Catherine and her son, Dan) joined us for Easter dinner. A great time was had by all as we ate, laughed together, and celebrated New Life.

Little did we know that our lives would be so quickly and dramatically changed by Hurricane Dolly on July 24. As we watched our beautiful home slowly sink into the rising flood waters, we knew that God was calling us to return to our roots, rejoin our families, and celebrate our new life back in the Midwest.

This year we are gathering with My Love's family to celebrate Easter Life. Also, we are rejoicing in the gift of life of my brother-in-law, Jim, whose birthday is April 11. With fine food, delicious wine, laughter and love, we will renew our faith, hope and love in the Resurrection of Jesus.

As we do so, know that you, our larger family and friends, will be present in our hearts and in our prayers. We wish you could join with us at the table. May you also find cause to sing an Alleluia in the midst of your own life.

Triduum Pattern

2009-04-09T00:01:00.003-05:00

These are my favorite days of the whole faith year: Holy Thursday, Good Friday and Holy Saturday, or, as they are more properly known, Feast of the Lord's Supper, Celebration of the Passion and Death of the Lord, and the Easter Vigil. In actuality, they are three parts of one reality, and are called the Triduum, or the Three Days.

When I was a child, Lent would end for us at noon on Holy Saturday. We would have been doing our Lenten penance for six weeks, that is, giving up candy. All those sweets would be piled up in a box. Then at noon on Holy Saturday, we would pig out, making up for all the "suffering" we had endured during the previous month and a half. It was at that point that the true suffering would begin as we over-indulged in the mountain of sugar we had denied ourselves.

Now, Lent ends with the beginning of the celebration of the Lord's Supper on Holy Thursday. At that point we focus on the re-presentation of the Suffering, Dying and Rising of Jesus by moving through the three day faith celebration, culminating in the hope, joy and triumph of Easter.

I guess the reason these days are so special for me is that they illustrate so powerfully and graphically the CYCLE of LIFE. This is the paradigm for interpreting my own experience, my own Sacred History. As I look back, I see the pattern repeated: suffering, dying, rising, suffering, dying, rising, over and over again. New life, new hope, new beginnings only come about out of the ashes and agony of the dying process.

With that realization, and the opportunity to celebrate in the midst of a faith community, I feel more hopeful, more joyful, more positive about whatever the future may bring. After all, if God could raise up Jesus after his suffering and death, God can surely bring me through my death experience to a new life. What an awesome God we have!

Sacred History

2009-04-07T00:01:00.002-05:00

Gail and Marilyn, who belong to our morning Bible study, are preparing to celebrate their 50th Wedding Anniversary in May. As part of the getting ready, they have been going through photo albums from their married life, picking photos for a slide presentation to be shown during the festivities. Last week, Marilyn shared with us what an awesome experience it has been to walk prayerfully through their history, and see the many ways that God has been present and blessed them.

One of the overwhelming realizations that they came to, and subsequently shared with us, was how God always seemed to be present, supporting them and guiding them, in the struggles and difficulties of their life together. That supportive presence was manifested most often and most consistently through whatever faith community they were a part of at the time. It might have been Christian Family Movement, Cursillo, Marriage Encounter, Charismatic Movement, or any number of other Catholic faith communities.

At this particular point in their faith journey, our morning Bible study is serving in that capacity of supportive and guiding faith community. For the last three years we have been sharing our faith as we reflect on and study the Bible. Their realization is that God has never left them without a faith community. At the same time, they have no idea where their life would be today were it not for the ever-present community of faith surrounding and carrying them along.

As they were sharing their insights and their gratitude for God's loving hand in their sacred history, I was struck with the importance of each one of us taking time to reflect on our own sacred history. From time to time, how encouraging and edifying it could be for us if we would spend time tracing the loving hand of God in our own lives. For it is a fact, God has always been with us. If we are not aware of God's presence, it is only because we have not taken the opportunity to peel back the top layer of our story and discover the underlying hand of God. We don't have to wait for a special occasion, like a 50th anniversary. We can do it today.

How To Flush a Toilet

2009-04-04T00:01:00.001-05:00

The first time I traveled to Africa in 1975, it was an eye-opening experience for me. Because this was my first time outside the USA, I was confronted with many new realities, and many familiar realities viewed in a new light. There were about 16 of us traveling together in a group. We had spent several weeks in Germany, a few days in Rome, and finally ended up for a couple of weeks in Tanzania, East Africa.

When asked to summarize my experience on our return to the States, I said: "There are many ways to flush a toilet." What I meant was that throughout our travels, I had discovered that in each country, in each culture, there were differing ways of doing things. Each country had developed certain systems for dealing with human problems, issues, needs and struggles. Some of them may have worked more successfully than others. Some may have been more complicated than others. Some may have been more expensive than others. But in the end, they all seemed to serve the needs of the particular people involved. No one way was better or worse than any other.

That was a life-changing experience for me because it helped me to let go of a certain judgmental outlook on life and people. Who was I to decide that life had to be a certain way? Who was I to judge how others dealt with the issues of daily life? Who was I to say that the way we do things in the USA is the best or only way to live life?

In the ensuing years, I believe that that attitude of letting others be has broadened. I find myself more willing to let others be themselves rather than what I think that they should be. I don't find the need (as much) to shape them into my idea of who or how they should live. And what a freeing development that has been. Since I have resigned as Master of the Universe, my stress level has decreased significantly, and my level of peace and joy has risen out of sight. When I let God be God, and let others be themselves, then I can be myself, and be at peace with that.

Revealing Words

2009-04-02T00:01:00.002-05:00

Back when I was a freshman in high school, my homeroom teacher wrote a saying on the blackboard (they were really BLACK back then!) each week. It would be some pithy saying that we could reflect on for the duration until she placed another one before us.

The only one I recall after all these years went something like this: "It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt." Although I have probably violated this more than a few times in my life, the message remains embedded in my memory forever.

Reflecting on these words today, several points come to my mind. First of all, we live in a world where we are bombarded by words every waking moment. Whether from radio, TV, computer, billboards, ipods, cell phone, home phone, email, texting, or whatever the latest gizmo for communicating might be, to say nothing of the voices of people around us every day. All this noise serves to render words very cheap and therefore easily ignored. Rather than facilitating communication, words tend to clog the arteries of interaction by their shear numbers.

Secondly, the words we do use reveal ourselves to others whether we want them to or not. Our chosen verbiage creates a small window to our heart, our spirit. If that verbiage smacks of loss of control, or reflects smallness of heart, or displays minimal intelligence, how can we expect to have a positive influence on those around us? On the other hand, if my words reveal humor, caring, joy, sensitivity to those around me, how much better off the world will be from my passing through it.

I wonder sometimes what my own words sound like to others. If I stop to listen to myself, what is it I hear? How do I sound? What is the message that others receive? Would I be farther ahead to heed the words of my high school homeroom teacher?

Forgiveness Brings Freedom

2009-03-31T00:01:00.004-05:00

Several days ago I was speaking with a man at the Wellness Center where My Love and I try to exercise 4 or 5 times a week. This fellow, whom I had only met for the first time the day before, was complaining loudly and at length about a perceived injustice that he had experienced from a local business. The longer he waxed on about this the more upset he became. When asked if he had spoken to the management about this, he said he had, but did not get the desired response from them. So he said that his plan was to "tell everyone he met" about his problem. He didn't want to "get over it", he wanted to "get even".

Since that encounter with him, I have been reflecting on how easy it is to imprison myself in the bondage of resentment. By hanging on to perceived injuries, I am the only one who continues to suffer; I am the one who gives the past its hold over me by continually pumping life into it in the present moment. I grant others power over my behaviors and reactions by keeping the supposed injury alive in my consciousness. I am the one who repeatedly tears open the wound of a long-past situation thereby preventing healing from taking place.

Only in forgiveness can I let go of hurtful experiences and be free of the influence that they wield over me. Only in the act of forgiving another can I break the bonds that enslave me to the past, thereby freeing me to experience the new life that the present holds out to me. As I open my hands to release the past pain, I ready myself to grasp the gift of peace God is offering right now. God lives only in the present, not in past hurts, nor in future worries.

At times I don't even WANT to forgive the other person. Then I must begin by praying for the grace to want to forgive. When I reach the point of desiring to forgive, then I soon realize that the actual pardoning of another is not just a once-and-for-all event. Sometimes this letting go must be done over and over again in order for it to sink to the roots of the injury.

For a beautiful, descriptive presentation of the freeing power of forgiveness in our lives, pick up the book, The Shack, by William P Young. It depicts the journey from bondage to freedom that is available to each one of us when we are open to the mystery of God's healing love.

What past hurtful moments/events come to your mind without effort? Is this the time that God wants to help you let go, to forgive? Is now the opportunity for new freedom?

Assessment Time

2009-03-28T00:01:00.004-05:00

As we come to the end of March, it's a good time to evaluate the journey that we have traveled over the last two months of this blog. Time to assess what has been happening and where we are going. This is the opportunity for you, Blog Followers (BFs), to let your voices be heard.

There are a number of questions that I would like to pose for your comments, questions whose answers will help me figure out the future direction.

1. Should this blog continue? Is it something that you want to follow, that you find entertaining or helpful?

2. Are there changes that you would like to suggest, either in format or content?

3. Do you have questions that you would like to have considered in upcoming posts?

4. Are you able to utilize the "Comment" directions in the left hand column? If you are having trouble posting a comment, please email me at franklreicks1@yahoo.com. Let me know if the comment function is not working or is too complicated so that I can make the necessary adjustments.

These past two months of writing this blog have proven to be both a challenge and a blessing for me. I have enjoyed the opportunity to pull together my thoughts and reflections into a (hopefully) readable format that others can enjoy and find beneficial. Yet, at the same time, the lack of response has left me wondering (1) Whether anyone is reading what I'm writing; (2) Should I continue with this project into the future.

Your feedback, BFs, preferably through the "Comment" function, or at least through the above listed email, will be seriously considered. Thank you.

Under The Circumstances

2009-03-26T00:01:00.003-05:00

A friend greeted me recently: "So, how are you doing?" Says I: "Pretty good under the circumstances." Without hesitation he responded: "What are you doing under there?"

After picking myself up off the floor, I began to reflect on what he was saying to me. Do I let situations and circumstances dictate how I am feeling? Am I controlled by what is going on around me, by what others do or don't do? Does something so simple as the weather affect my outlook and attitude for the day?

Or do I truly operate out of the center of my own being, out of the belief that God is in charge and therefore I am at peace. Does my equanimity reflect my trust in an all-powerful and all-loving God? Another friend said to me many years ago: "If you believe that Jesus is Lord, then an earthquake shouldn't shake you up!" I guess that even applies to a hurricane!

Many times I know this in my head, but it's my stomach that has a hard time catching up. Often my belief has to sink down from my head into my heart so that I can really be at peace, even though the circumstances are threatening to overwhelm me. I'm reminded of my friend, Greg, who says: "When you are up to your waist in alligators, it's hard to remember that you came in to drain the swamp."

What are your circumstances today? Are you under them, or on top of them? Where do you want to be?

Humility=Honesty

2009-03-24T00:01:00.002-05:00

A few years ago there was a song with the line "O Lord, it's hard to be humble, when you're perfect in every way!" Although it was a tongue-in-cheek hit, there was a certain element of truth contained just under the surface.

Humility as a virtue has had a bad press. It is generally seen as a "face in the dirt" kind of existence, one that is not very attractive or popular. As a take-off on the Beatitude "Blessed are the humble for they shall inherit the earth", there was a line in a musical which stated, "It's not the earth that they inherit, but the dirt." This comes from the mistaken impression that to be humble means I must adopt an attitude that says "I'm no good. I can't do anything. Everyone else is better than me."

Yet, in the Scriptures, this is anything but the truth. Jesus says: "Take my yoke and learn from me for I am gentle and humble of heart" (Matt 11:29). This is the same Jesus who healed the sick, confronted the Pharisees, made a cord and drove the money changers from the temple. He was anything but a Casper Milquetoast. Jesus knew who He was, why He had come, and what His Father's calling was for Him. He didn't deny it, but stepped out in strength and honesty to confront whatever evil, sickness or corruption that He encountered in the power given Him by the Spirit of His Father in service of others.

I believe that true humility is nothing more than honesty. Humility means knowing who I am, who God is, and what is the true relationship between the two of us. All three of those elements are critically important.

Who I am. I am first of all a Redeemed Sinner. That is, I have my shortcomings, my failings, my limitations, my sins. At times this is obvious to me; at other times I can bury my head in the sand and pretend that it is not true. But when I am willing to accept the reality of my sinfulness, then I am in the privileged position to experience the second part of this reality: I am a REDEEMED sinner. From that comes my true glory and value.

Following upon the acceptance of this reality comes the freedom to acknowledge all the gifts and talents with which I have been endowed by God. Yes, I can do THIS. Yes, I have the ability to accomplish THAT. Yes, I do have special abilities that no one else has. All this makes me unique and special, not because of me, but because of the One who has blessed me. As Mary says in the Gospel of Luke: "All ages to come shall call me blessed for God who is mighty has done great things for me" (1:48-49). This is acknowledging who God is, the origin of all that we are and have. This is part of living in proper relationship to God.

Herein lies the honesty that is real humility. Not poo-pooing the gifts, downplaying our talents, denying God's goodness in us, but rather acknowledging them, accepting them and freely sharing them with the world around us. After all, they are not given for our own self-aggrandizement, but for the service of others.

A person who has always struck me as genuinely humble in this sense is my mother-in-law. When she is complimented or praised for something, she simply says: "Thank you." She acknowledges it, she accepts it, and she gives it in service for others. She blesses others by being a blessing.

How can you grow in true honesty, true humility?

What Are Your Goggles?

2009-03-21T00:01:00.003-05:00

There is a country western song entitled "Billy's Got His Beer Goggles On". It is about how drinking too much beer affects Billy's perception of reality around him.

This set me thinking about the goggles that I wear or have worn throughout my life. The various viewpoints I've held that have affected the way that I perceived life, people, relationships, the world, etc.

When I served as a priest, I viewed things through the goggles of the Catholic Church. People, relationships, lifestyles, finances, medical science, scripture, worship - everything was filtered through the teachings and stance of the Church. Whether I agreed with that viewpoint was not the issue. Only that there was that set of goggles which affected how I saw and related to reality around me.

As a nursing home administrator, I found that my goggles changed. There is life after/outside the perspective of the Church. Not that they were opposed to each other, or even in conflict. Only that now I saw things from the point of view of ministering to people who were nearing the end of their lives, or to the families of those folks, and doing it while observing the many State and Federal regulations involved. It was also to be done within the parameters of the company that hired me in such a way as to make a profit. It was a different set of realities, and my goggles changed accordingly.

Now as I find myself in the automotive industry, another set of goggles is available to me. I am especially aware of those goggles because the owner/boss that I am working with has been in this industry for 40+ years. Of necessity, he eats, drinks, sleeps and lives automobiles, their sales, trades and repairs. Reality seen through his eyes has a definite slant or perspective.

As I reflect on the various goggles that I have worn (and there are many other smaller sets that I have not mentioned), I have come to two conclusions. First of all, I see the importance of not identifying myself with the goggles at any time. I am not any one of the various viewpoints that I lived through in my lifetime. These are simply perspectives on reality that I carried for a time.

Secondly, no set of goggles is the same as the reality that they perceive. Reality is set apart from any particular viewpoint or filter through which it is viewed. In other words, the Catholic viewpoint, the nursing home viewpoint, the auto dealer viewpoint is just that -- a perception of reality that is both insightful and distorting at the same time. Insightful because it gives a deeper perception into life; but distorting because it is limited to the narrow confines of this one perspective.

I am reminded of the story of the four blind men trying to describe an elephant. The one holding the tail described it as similar to a rope. With his arms around a leg, the second man waxed eloquent comparing the elephant to a tree. The third man, with his hands around the trunk, assured the others that the beast was like a fire hose. Finally, the fourth man, taking hold of the ear, contended that the animal was like a large, tough leaf. All were right, but not completely; all were also wrong, but not totally.

No matter what goggles we wear, it is important for us to realize the limitations as well as the benefits of our perspective. That is especially true where God, faith and church are concerned. God is bigger than any of our perceptions. God is distinct from all of our views. What freedom there is in knowing that.

What are your goggles? How do they help/hinder you?

To Worry or Not To Worry

2009-03-19T00:01:00.001-05:00

Yesterday I received an email from a dear friend with the following questions:

"I would like to know your opinion , what is your feeling when something really worries you?

How do you let go? What do people do, to leave the baggage at the feet of Jesus or in the hands of God? I hear friends say "Let go and let God." How do I let go of the worry and not take it back?"

These are questions that deal with two different issues with which we all struggle from time to time. The most basic of issues involved are: Trust, and Control. Can I REALLY trust that God is in charge of my life? Can I REALLY trust that God has my best interest at heart? Can I truly believe that, as St Paul says: "Everything works together for good for those who love God, those whom God has chosen according to His own purposes" (Romans 8:28)? Or do I need to keep one hand on the steering wheel just in case God doesn't go in the right direction? It is one thing to SAY that I believe that God wants only good for me, and quite another to let the reality settle from my head down into my heart, my stomach, my gut where the worrying takes place.

The second issue of Control touches on something so deep within us that many times we are not even aware of it. Who/what is in control of my life? Who/what do I allow to "call the shots" for me? Do I say that I have surrendered my life to God, to Jesus? Do I allow God's plan to unfold even when I don't like it? Or do I feel that I must control my own destiny? It is relatively easy to "Let go and Let God" when things are going the way that I want them to go. But when others do not act according MY plan, and things in my life are messed up, then I have more difficulty in letting go.

Someone once told me that "Worry is a down payment on a future event that probably won't happen." It set me to thinking about how much energy I waste when I worry, energy that could be more constructively used in living in the present, dealing with current issues, enjoying present pleasures, instead of focusing on tomorrow.

So, how do I "Let go and let God"? I do it moment by moment, hour by hour, day by day. It is never done once and for all. I let go of something with one hand, only to take it back with the other, only to let go of it once again. It seems that the more quickly I let go of something, the more readily I'm able to let go of it the next time I find that I have taken it back. Important for me is not to hang on to anything too long. As soon as I realize that I have taken it back, I need to turn right around and place it into the loving hands of God once again. This pattern repeats itself over and over. Is it easy? No! But it does seem to become easier the more often I do it.

As a side note, I find that the support of a loving faith community provides a huge assist in letting go. The sooner that I share my worry/concern with another in faith, the quicker and easier it becomes to release it into God's hands. By opening my worried heart to another, I let in the healing Spirit of God that deepens my Trust and helps me to surrender my Control to God who wants to make "everything work together for good". This is truly a case of "practice makes perfect", but with the realization that it will never be finished until I leave this life.

For a beautiful reflection on this issue of worry, go to the blog of my niece, Gitzen Girl. Just click on that link to be blessed by her experience and the experience of many of her followers. We all struggle with the same questions in different circumstances, and different ways.

Pickled Herring

2009-03-17T00:01:00.004-05:00

A jar of pickled herring sits in our refrigerator, waiting to be enjoyed. Those little morsels are wonderful on a cracker or corn chip while sipping on a glass of wine. A relaxing happy hour while watching the news with My Love.

But I can't relish those pickled herring without recalling my Father, who died in 1971. At the beginning of each Lenten season, he would get a jar of pickled herring squares. He would munch on those herring pieces throughout the Lenten season, until finally Easter would arrive about the time that the bottom of the jar was reached. To this day, I don't know if he actually enjoyed the pickled herring, or if it was one of the penances that he took upon himself for that penitential season. This is one of the mysteries of my youth that remain with me today.

My Father remains for me a pillar of strength and faith. He was quiet, not easily riled, and always willing to help anyone in need. His largeness of heart reached out and touched many people, as was evidenced by the fact that his funeral was the largest one ever in our parish church. For me, his life is best summarized in his favorite prayer, the "Serenity Prayer".

"Lord, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The Courage to change the things I can,
And the Wisdom to know the difference."

He was not one who was afraid to become involved, especially in his Church. My memory of him includes him actively engaged as one of the men who counted the collection after the Sunday Masses, going with one of his trucks to help haul things around the church property that needed to be transported, ushering in church, and many other occasions of service. If there was a need that he could meet, he was there.

I don't recall him ever getting angry. He seemed to be able to accept life as it came at him, and to accept people the way they presented themselves. Truly he seemed to have the wisdom to know the difference.

One night, a month or two after he had died very unexpectedly in September, 1971, I had a dream in which my Father came to me. I began to argue with him, saying that he was not supposed to be there because he was dead. But he said that he was only there to tell me that everything was OK. There was nothing to be concerned about. That was so typical of him, and I found it to be very reassuring.

However I was unable to ask him about the pickled herring and his reason for eating it during Lent. That is just one of the questions that will have to wait until I meet him again after I die.

Random Acts of Kindness

2009-03-13T00:01:00.002-05:00

Yesterday on our morning Bible sharing, Clar was describing an incident she witnessed the day before at her place of employment. While working as a checker at WalMart, a woman came through her checkout line with a number of items. When totaled up, the bill was $6.00 more than she could afford, so she said that she would have to do without some of her selections. As she was trying to decide which things she could dispense with, the man behind her handed Clar a $20 bill and said that he would cover the extra expense. Then he added: "And give her (the woman) the change."

Such a Random Act of Kindness no doubt meant a lot to the woman who was shopping for items she needed for her life. I would guess that she left that store feeling just a little more positive about life and about people if not to say relieved.

That Random Act of Kindness also touched Clar as she recalled it as a highpoint of her day, a day which saw many people passing through her checkout line. This action made enough of an impact on her that she felt compelled to tell us about it during our sharing time.

Finally, it touched the rest of us in our Bible sharing group as she revealed the incident to us. In fact, it so impressed me that I began reflecting on it throughout the day. And here I am passing it on to you, Blog Followers, in my Musings. I have even found myself looking for my own opportunities to perform some Random Act of Kindness.

Like a pebble dropped into a still pond, a single Random Act of Kindness sends ripples out in ever-expanding circles. No one can engage in such a RAK and remain untouched, unchanged. Such a spontaneous gesture reverberates into eternity.

Please tell me in the Comments below: How have you been touched by someone else's Random Act of Kindness? or How have you bestowed a Random Act of Kindness on someone else and how did that change you? or Relate a Random Act of Kindness that you observed someone else engaging in.

By such simple acts the world becomes a better place. These gestures, more than government programs, change people's lives. These make God present today.

Needs, Wants, Desires

2009-03-11T00:01:00.002-05:00

For the last 5+ months I have been working in an auto dealership as Financial/Business Manager. It has been a challenging, stretching, educational and enjoyable time as I've been learning a whole new culture, vocabulary and system. Plus I've had the pleasure of working with some friendly people.

The owner/manager, my boss, often says that people have "needs, wants and desires". Because of this, they will be around to purchase new or at least different vehicles. Some need a different car or truck because their present vehicle has died, been wrecked, or is otherwise unserviceable. And they still need to get from point A to point B.

Others want a different vehicle because they've had the current one too long, it's too big and uses too much gas, or for whatever reason they have found to justify/rationalize this purchase.

Finally, some people just desire a new/different car or truck for no reason at all. But they are able and willing to make a purchase at this point.

These three groups of people make the auto business possible because here in rural Iowa, there is no public transportation available, and people still wish to travel outside their homes. No one is ready to accept a future of staying at home.

All this set me thinking about the present economic crisis in which we find ourselves embroiled. Perhaps one of the good things that is going to come of it is that people will once again learn to distinguish between their needs and their wants/desires. With the limited resources facing us, personally and as a people, perhaps we will discover that our needs are really very few. Not much is required to meet the real needs of our life.

It seems to me that many people have backed themselves into a financial corner because they have confused their wants with their needs. By becoming slaves to their own wants and desires, they have put themselves on an endless treadmill with no end in sight.

Our wants and desires stretch beyond the horizon, thereby making us restless and unhappy. Modern advertising paints a continually changing picture of unlimited wants and desires. Confusing our wants/desires with our needs only stirs up dissatisfaction and discontent with our present situation since it is impossible to satisfy them all.

This is not to say that we should not have dreams or goals. Nor is it to say that we should be satisfied with being less than our best. Obviously, God calls us to be all that we have been created to be, to use our gifts and talents for others, for the good of the world. But part of that process is to be able to distinguish between our own needs and our wants or desires.

If we can learn to focus on meeting our needs, and being satisfied when that has happened, wouldn't we be much more content? Wouldn't it be great to be free of the pressure of the unlimited wants/desires created by modern advertising? Wouldn't we be more ready to notice the needs of others and work to help them?

Where are you on the needs/wants/desires spectrum? How can you learn to distinguish between them and grow in freedom?

It's All About Family

2009-03-09T09:04:00.004-05:00

This past weekend My Love's niece, Janet, her husband Rob and their three children blessed our home with a visit. Ben ("I'm four and a half"), Ella (3), and little Alaina (10 months) entertained us and enjoyed swimming in our local rec center on Saturday afternoon. This was followed by games and a late supper.

Then on Sunday morning we went to church and out to the home of My Love's sister, Annette and her husband, Jim, for brunch. Even with the snow and sleet, we all had a wonderful time.

What a blessing it is to be able to enjoy family once again. During our 12 years in south Texas, it was only occasionally possible to be present for gatherings and events of our families. Our annual trip north forced us to cram in as much "quick" visits as possible for graduations, anniversaries, or whatever else we could squeeze in. But we were aware that we missed out on much.

Now, thanks to the blessing of Hurricane Dolly, we are back here in Iowa. This affords us many opportunities, some of them daily, to participate in family events, enjoy family presences, assist with family needs, and reconnect with family members.

As I get older, I see more and more clearly that family is the first and most important human relationship. As My Love is wont to say: Family is a love you can count on. What a blessing we have, and how grateful we are to be back here in Iowa where we can spend a weekend getting to know the next generation of our families. And how encouraging it is to see the tremendous job these young parents are doing in guiding and shaping the youngsters who have been placed in their care.

God is truly good, and getting better all the time!

What's Your Message?

2009-03-07T00:01:00.000-06:00

Email is a great way to communicate quickly with other people. Though I'm sure that those who are into text messaging would say that email is outdated. However, since I'm not into TM, I'm satisfied with using old fashioned methods like email, and even the telephone!

Recently I've been aware of how some people utilize email to disseminate negative information, negative opinions, negative feelings and prejudices. It's almost like they are a cauldron filled with poisonous liquid, and by bumping against them through the email, that liquid spills over and splashes on me. I feel blemished and tarnished from the exposure and contact.

The second category of missives that I do not appreciate are those that have a religious message which ends with some kind of guilt statement, i.e., if I don't send this on, then I am denying my faith or failing to profess it. Another type of this message is the good/bad fortune promise: if I just send this to X number of people I will receive a surprise, if I don't something terrible will happen.

Just on principle, I delete both of these missives. In my judgment, if the message does not build people up, help them to laugh or at least smile, feel better about themselves or the world we live in, then it does not deserve to be forwarded. There is no blessing in spreading negative energy in our world. There is enough of that already.

What a gift and treasure it is to be able to communicate with people in the rapid manners that are available to us. What a positive impact we can have when we use those methods to draw closer to one another, to improve our world a little bit.

It All Depends...

2009-03-04T00:01:00.001-06:00

Last Saturday evening, many of the employees from my place of work gathered at the local bowling alley for a party. It was a good time of fun, food, drink and fellowship as we ate pizza, enjoyed a few beers and laughed together while throwing bowling balls at pins.

One of the things I observed during the bowling was that many of the men rolled the ball as hard as they could, apparently trying to "kill" as many pins as possible. Sometimes it worked, sometimes they found only the gutter.

On the other hand, one of the women simply rolled the ball down the alley at a slow, leisurely pace. It would take a while to reach the pins, but most of the time, when it finally arrived, it was in the right area, and she would get a strike. She had one of the higher scores for the evening.

Yesterday morning on our bible study call, we were reflecting on the topic: "Dependence on God", and especially the verse from Zechariah 4:6, "Not by power, nor by might but by my Spirit says the Lord of Hosts." How often we depend on our own strength, our own ideas, our own way of doing things, thinking that we know best. God is waiting to take our hand, lead us through the darkness, pain, struggle, difficulty that we find ourselves in. Yet, so often we think that we must do it alone, or that we must prove something using only our own power and might.

It is always amazing to me that each person, each generation seems to operate under the impression that history began at the moment that they set foot upon this earth. Nothing that preceded their birth has any value, and certainly not any wisdom or knowledge from which they could gain insight. As a result, each generation, and even each individual has to relearn the lessons of history, make the same mistakes that others have suffered through.

What we are invited to do through the stories of our ancestors in the faith, both in our own families and in the Scriptures, is to see the pattern that we all go through. We try to live by our own strength, our own plan. Then we stumble, fall on our faces. If we are down low enough, we look up, cry out for help, and then God comes to our aid and lifts us up. We go along for a while, hand in hand with God. Then we think that we can do it on our own again, that we don't need God. So, the cycle begins all over again.

Our greatest sin is not that we do terrible things, like lie, cheat, steal or kill others. Our greatest sin is that we FORGET! We forget that we depend upon God for every breath we take. We forget that without God we can do nothing. We forget all the times that God has been faithful to us. We forget the many occasions when God has saved our hide (literally and figuratively!). We FORGET -- and then we act as though God is not there.

What a wonderful opportunity Lent is to REMEMBER! To remember Who God Is, who I am, and how the two are connected. It's not by my might or my power that I will knock down the pins of life, but by the Spirit of God. What a relief that is. Would that I could remember it always!

Why Lenten Penance?

2009-03-02T00:01:00.000-06:00

Last Friday at work a fellow worker asked me the question: "Why do Catholics not eat meat on Fridays during Lent?" It was a legitimate question since several of us were eating fish sandwiches. But behind the question was a deeper one: What is the value of penance, of self-denial?

At first, I answered the query in a flippant manner, saying that it was due to the story in the gospel after Easter. Jesus appeared to the apostles who were out fishing. When he inquired whether they had caught anything, they said No. Then he told them to throw the nets on the other side of the boat, whereupon they caught so many fish that the nets were nearly breaking. So, I said that ever since, we have been eating fish on Fridays to get rid of that supply.

But then, seriously, I told them that our choice to limit our diets was an attempt to recognize that we have hungers that cannot be met by ordinary food. When we deny ourselves something that we would like to have, it is a way for us to acknowledge that fact as we plug into the deeper hungers within, in particular the hunger for love, joy, peace, etc. These hungers can ultimately be met only by our relationship with God in Jesus.

In our world of instant gratification, it is rather unusual for us to deny ourselves anything at anytime. That seems to run contrary to the current. Yet if we are going to truly Choose Life in each moment, we need to say No to those things that are not life-giving in the long run. That is not always easy to distinguish in the immediate circumstances. Since we can be easily controlled by some of our impulses, it is helpful to choose to curb those impulses by simple things, like not eating meat on Fridays.

The only reason for any penance during Lent is to make us more aware of the Lord's life within us. If it does not accomplish that, then it is only an empty gesture. If my penance becomes a burden for others, then I better question its true value and reassess my priorities, choices, and direction. Lent is not to be a burden, but an opportunity for growth in faith and love. Anything else is a waste of time.

The Hurrier I Go, The Behinder I Get!

2009-02-27T00:01:00.001-06:00

When I was growing up, I spent a few summers with my uncles on the farm. It was a time that I recall with fondness, fun, reaching out and trying new things.

One of the memories I have is of my Uncle Melvin quoting to me: "The hurrier I go, the behinder I get!" It was his way of saying, "Haste makes waste". And many times throughout my life I have learned the truth in that simple statement.

Yesterday, after going to Des Moines the day before to take a class on Credit Insurance, I drove to Sioux City early in the morning to take a test for my Credit Insurance license. This is a requirement for the job that I have as the Finance & Insurance Manager at the Ford dealership in nearby Cherokee. While it was stressful only in the sense that it pushed my endurance with all the traveling, I found it to be a challenge because it gave me the opportunity to learn something new.

However, as I was taking the test on the computer (50 questions in one hour time), I found myself needing to slow down, think about what I was doing, and take the time necessary to figure out the correct answers. I kept repeating: "The hurrier I go, the behinder I get!" I know my natural tendency to rush through things, and this way I was able to deal with my own impatience. In the end, I finished the test in about 35 minutes and achieved a 94%.

Yet how often do I not take the necessary time to listen to someone? How often do I rush through a situation and not appreciate each moment and each person that I am dealing with? How often do I miss the richness of the NOW because I am hurrying to get to the more important NEXT?

This Lenten season is a great opportunity to STOP, LOOK and LISTEN once again to the Lord who is present ONLY in the now. Otherwise, I will learn again Melvin's truth: "The hurrier I go, the behinder I get."

Lent Happens!

2009-02-25T00:01:00.002-06:00

Today is Ash Wednesday, the end of Mardi Gras, and the beginning of Lent. It begins the traditional season of penance in preparation for the upcoming season of Easter when we welcome the New Life of the Resurrection.

For some people, this is the season of resolutions, much like the beginning of the New Year. This is the time to give up things (candy, desserts, extra helpings at dinner -- maybe with the underlying motivation to loose some undesired weight--or maybe some bad habits, unkind thoughts, temper tantrums or whatever else we can think of).

For others, it may be a time to add some extra things to our lives, like visiting someone who is a shut-in, stopping at the nursing home to say hello to a friend, picking up groceries for a neighbor. All these are good things, and can have a beneficial effect upon our lives by helping us to overcome the self-centeredness that we all struggle with.

However, for me, LENT IS SOMETHING THAT HAPPENS TO ME. In my experience, I have gained more, grown more and been transformed more when I have welcomed each day, each person, each situation and each circumstance with open arms and an open heart. In this way, I have found that I am more ready to recognize, acknowledge and accept the God who is among us both in myself and in others. I don't need to sit down and try to figure out what I'm going to DO this Lent. I don't have to set up MY plan for Lent. I simply need to open myself to God's plan each day as it unfolds before me. Most of the time, God surprises me. And in these surprises I am challenged, stretched and transformed.

All I need to DO is Let God Be God, and Let Lent Happen.