Relationships Are Forever

Through the years I have been in many positions of leadership where I was responsible for building something. As a pastor I worked to build a Christian community in the parishes I served; as an educator I tried to build a community of learning and growth in the schools I was a part of; as a nursing home administrator I labored to create a caring family among the staff in order to serve the residents and their families. All of this was a labor of love, and one which was very gratifying at the time in spite of the obstacles that were a part of the picture.

However, what I found to be very difficult was that so often, when I left the scene and moved on to another field of service, my successor(s) would undo much of what I felt I had accomplished. They would bring their own leadership styles, insights, judgments and plans to the situation which led many times to, what seemed to me, tearing down much of the good that I had accomplished. This was very frustrating for me for a long time.

Then, after a while, I came to realize that from each situation I had come away with unique and treasured relationships which no one but I could destroy. These connections to special people transcended any locale, any distance, any occupation or preoccupation that we were involved in. These friendships were God-given, God-blessed, and were untouchable by those who came after me. These relationships are timeless and will endure forever.

One of those special people who came across my path was Fr Darrell Rupiper, OMI. My Love and I had the good fortune to meet him when he came to our parish in Pharr, Texas, several years ago for a mission/retreat on respecting the earth as God's gift to us. He was truly a man of God who spoke the truth both in season and out. He graced our home on two occasions and we shared faith, food and refreshments as we enjoyed one another's company.

Fr Darrell died February 10 and we rejoice that he is now sharing in the Great Gathering of Friends and Family that awaits us all. You can see some of his own reflections on his journey through illness, and pictures by going to his last web page on CaringBridge.org. He will be missed by many, but he is still connected to all of us whose lives he touched. Relationships are forever.

Therefore, in the last few years, I have focused more energy on building relationships, rather than completing projects. Projects will come and go, but the relationships will endure into the next life. Only the hearts that I have touched, and those that I have let touch mine will survive the power of death. Only relationships last forever.