If the saying "It takes all kinds to make the world go 'round" has any truth to it, it is in the car business. Each person that comes through the door looking for a vehicle is as unique and different from every other one as is possible.
Recently we had a customer who was shopping (for several months actually) for a car for his wife. He had found one that she liked here at our dealership. Now it was just a matter of negotiating an acceptable price.
During the process of negotiation and subsequent sale, one thing became very clear. This fellow had framed his world in a win-lose mold. Every situation, every encounter was defined in such a way that someone would be dominant and the other would be subservient. He was bound and determined to be the one who exerted the power and others were required to cowtow to him. It was not enough that he got most of what he wanted in the process, he had to have all of what he wanted or he was unhappy because he had not really won. For him, the only important thing was winning, dominating, getting his way.
I have thought of him often since that encounter. What an unhappy way to structure reality. What a miserable way to live. To set up life in such a way that there is always a winner and a loser guarantees that in every situation half the people are going to be dissatisfied, half the people are left unhappy.
Fortunately, God does not operate in that framework with us. When we set things up in a win-lose scenario, God draws a bigger circle and makes it possible for everyone to win. In St Paul's letter to the Romans, we are told: "God makes all things work together for good for those who love God, those who are called according to his purposes" (8:28). So even when we may feel like we are on the losing end of the stick, we simply need to re-focus our eyes to see with the vision of faith that God is at work to bring about something even better.
What is your framework for viewing the reality of your life? Are you a winner? Is everyone around you?
Showing posts with label power. Show all posts
Showing posts with label power. Show all posts
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
It All Depends...
Last Saturday evening, many of the employees from my place of work gathered at the local bowling alley for a party. It was a good time of fun, food, drink and fellowship as we ate pizza, enjoyed a few beers and laughed together while throwing bowling balls at pins.
One of the things I observed during the bowling was that many of the men rolled the ball as hard as they could, apparently trying to "kill" as many pins as possible. Sometimes it worked, sometimes they found only the gutter.
On the other hand, one of the women simply rolled the ball down the alley at a slow, leisurely pace. It would take a while to reach the pins, but most of the time, when it finally arrived, it was in the right area, and she would get a strike. She had one of the higher scores for the evening.
Yesterday morning on our bible study call, we were reflecting on the topic: "Dependence on God", and especially the verse from Zechariah 4:6, "Not by power, nor by might but by my Spirit says the Lord of Hosts." How often we depend on our own strength, our own ideas, our own way of doing things, thinking that we know best. God is waiting to take our hand, lead us through the darkness, pain, struggle, difficulty that we find ourselves in. Yet, so often we think that we must do it alone, or that we must prove something using only our own power and might.
It is always amazing to me that each person, each generation seems to operate under the impression that history began at the moment that they set foot upon this earth. Nothing that preceded their birth has any value, and certainly not any wisdom or knowledge from which they could gain insight. As a result, each generation, and even each individual has to relearn the lessons of history, make the same mistakes that others have suffered through.
What we are invited to do through the stories of our ancestors in the faith, both in our own families and in the Scriptures, is to see the pattern that we all go through. We try to live by our own strength, our own plan. Then we stumble, fall on our faces. If we are down low enough, we look up, cry out for help, and then God comes to our aid and lifts us up. We go along for a while, hand in hand with God. Then we think that we can do it on our own again, that we don't need God. So, the cycle begins all over again.
Our greatest sin is not that we do terrible things, like lie, cheat, steal or kill others. Our greatest sin is that we FORGET! We forget that we depend upon God for every breath we take. We forget that without God we can do nothing. We forget all the times that God has been faithful to us. We forget the many occasions when God has saved our hide (literally and figuratively!). We FORGET -- and then we act as though God is not there.
What a wonderful opportunity Lent is to REMEMBER! To remember Who God Is, who I am, and how the two are connected. It's not by my might or my power that I will knock down the pins of life, but by the Spirit of God. What a relief that is. Would that I could remember it always!
One of the things I observed during the bowling was that many of the men rolled the ball as hard as they could, apparently trying to "kill" as many pins as possible. Sometimes it worked, sometimes they found only the gutter.
On the other hand, one of the women simply rolled the ball down the alley at a slow, leisurely pace. It would take a while to reach the pins, but most of the time, when it finally arrived, it was in the right area, and she would get a strike. She had one of the higher scores for the evening.
Yesterday morning on our bible study call, we were reflecting on the topic: "Dependence on God", and especially the verse from Zechariah 4:6, "Not by power, nor by might but by my Spirit says the Lord of Hosts." How often we depend on our own strength, our own ideas, our own way of doing things, thinking that we know best. God is waiting to take our hand, lead us through the darkness, pain, struggle, difficulty that we find ourselves in. Yet, so often we think that we must do it alone, or that we must prove something using only our own power and might.
It is always amazing to me that each person, each generation seems to operate under the impression that history began at the moment that they set foot upon this earth. Nothing that preceded their birth has any value, and certainly not any wisdom or knowledge from which they could gain insight. As a result, each generation, and even each individual has to relearn the lessons of history, make the same mistakes that others have suffered through.
What we are invited to do through the stories of our ancestors in the faith, both in our own families and in the Scriptures, is to see the pattern that we all go through. We try to live by our own strength, our own plan. Then we stumble, fall on our faces. If we are down low enough, we look up, cry out for help, and then God comes to our aid and lifts us up. We go along for a while, hand in hand with God. Then we think that we can do it on our own again, that we don't need God. So, the cycle begins all over again.
Our greatest sin is not that we do terrible things, like lie, cheat, steal or kill others. Our greatest sin is that we FORGET! We forget that we depend upon God for every breath we take. We forget that without God we can do nothing. We forget all the times that God has been faithful to us. We forget the many occasions when God has saved our hide (literally and figuratively!). We FORGET -- and then we act as though God is not there.
What a wonderful opportunity Lent is to REMEMBER! To remember Who God Is, who I am, and how the two are connected. It's not by my might or my power that I will knock down the pins of life, but by the Spirit of God. What a relief that is. Would that I could remember it always!
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Power: Who Holds It For You?
As a junior and senior in high school, I was blessed to have Sister Margaret Mary for English, speech and drama. She taught me everything I know about public speaking and helped me find a presence and style that has served me even to this day. What is amazing is that I can't really remember anything specific that she did or said, but it was just her belief in me that I could do it and be successful at it that made the difference. Since that time, whenever I have been in a public speaking venue, I have been comfortable and fairly effective.
This all came back to me when a friend recently quoted a definition of "power" to me. She said: "Power is the ability to define reality in a certain way, and have others accept that definition as their own." (I wish I knew where this definition comes from so I could give proper credit.) This power can be either a positive or a negative experience.
When that power is exercised for evil, it can lead to horrendous atrocities, for example as in the case of Adolph Hitler defining the Jews as the cause of all problems and needing to be eradicated. His definition was accepted as their own by enough of his followers to eliminate 5 million people.
Imagine the parents or teachers who say to children in either words or actions: "You are no good. You'll never amount to anything!" We know what power that definition of reality has upon those kids as they internalize it as their own. They grow up with very negative images of themselves. We've all seen examples of these troubled individuals behaving according to the definition they've been given.
On the other hand, when someone like Sister Margaret Mary defines me, sees me as successful, and helps me to see that also, she exercises a power that has a tremendously positive influence. With such a definition of myself, there is no limit to the possibilities in my life. I am comfortable in my own skin, and not afraid to step out into the unknown because the possibility of failure does not prevent me from growing.
Then take it one step further. If my definition of reality comes from the Scriptures, from God's Word to me, I realize that I am loved with a Divine Love, just as I am. "I have loved you with an everlasting love. You are mine." (Jer 31:3) When I internalize God's definition of me as Beloved, when I give God power in my life by accepting the Divine reality, then my whole perspective on life changes and I become truly free. This exercise of power brings forth life for me and for others.
By whose definition of reality are you living? To whom have you given the power to define your world, your person?
This all came back to me when a friend recently quoted a definition of "power" to me. She said: "Power is the ability to define reality in a certain way, and have others accept that definition as their own." (I wish I knew where this definition comes from so I could give proper credit.) This power can be either a positive or a negative experience.
When that power is exercised for evil, it can lead to horrendous atrocities, for example as in the case of Adolph Hitler defining the Jews as the cause of all problems and needing to be eradicated. His definition was accepted as their own by enough of his followers to eliminate 5 million people.
Imagine the parents or teachers who say to children in either words or actions: "You are no good. You'll never amount to anything!" We know what power that definition of reality has upon those kids as they internalize it as their own. They grow up with very negative images of themselves. We've all seen examples of these troubled individuals behaving according to the definition they've been given.
On the other hand, when someone like Sister Margaret Mary defines me, sees me as successful, and helps me to see that also, she exercises a power that has a tremendously positive influence. With such a definition of myself, there is no limit to the possibilities in my life. I am comfortable in my own skin, and not afraid to step out into the unknown because the possibility of failure does not prevent me from growing.
Then take it one step further. If my definition of reality comes from the Scriptures, from God's Word to me, I realize that I am loved with a Divine Love, just as I am. "I have loved you with an everlasting love. You are mine." (Jer 31:3) When I internalize God's definition of me as Beloved, when I give God power in my life by accepting the Divine reality, then my whole perspective on life changes and I become truly free. This exercise of power brings forth life for me and for others.
By whose definition of reality are you living? To whom have you given the power to define your world, your person?
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